Angel S05 E18 – Return of the prodigal

Previously: Fred continued to be dead, a suit-wearing Jayne turned up, and Gunn volunteered for a trip to white-picket hell so they could save Lindsey.

Origin

Kirsti: A very rough looking Wes stands in Fred’s old office, watching Illyria generally be weird in Evil Radio Shack below. When Angel turns up, Wes says that Illyria is either “counting oxygen molecules or analysing the petri dish she just put into her mouth.” Angel tells Wes that Illyria isn’t his responsibility, she’s THEIR responsibility and they should be testing and/or studying her. Wes says that Illyria’s not much with the people, and that someone might get hurt. “We’ll make Spike do it,” Angel says quickly. Wes vaguely agrees before saying that Illyria needs a guide in our world. Angel’s all “Right, but you need sleep. And also to stop punishing yourself. Because you look like a crazy person right now and also my Super Smelling Abilities can smell your excess drinking and lack of showering all over the building and it’s gross.” It’s possible I made up that third sentence, but it’s pretty strongly implied by Angel’s sassy eyebrows. (S: A+)

Cut to Wes’ office. A well-to-do middle aged couple tell him that their son was out getting the mail when a van driving stupidly fast hit him and slammed him into the side of the garage. Wes is disinterested and asked if the LOLPD homicide department have found the van. But the couple inform him that their son’s not dead. More than that, he basically doesn’t have a scratch on him. One of the LOLPD called them and said that their son might be a special snowflake and to call his bosses a certain law firm that deals with shit like this. Wes picks up the phone and requests Angel’s presence. The couple ask if Wes will help them, saying that their son is downstairs. Cut to the lobby. Angel moodily heads towards Wes’ office. Behind him, the elevator dings. A second later, a voice calls “HEY, DAD.” He turns to see Connor half-smiling at him. The zoomy cameraman zooms in on Angel’s shocked expression. Electric cellos.

Sweeney: Graduation goggles are weird, man. I’m actually pleased to see this twisted little psycho’s face. I mean, I guess he no longer knows he’s a twisted little psycho. Whatever. Point is: I’m glad this loose end is about to get tied up.

Lorraine: ME TOO, ME TOO. The episode description I read made it seem like Connor’s parents would show up. I didn’t know Vincent Kartheiser would be here, but yeah, considering my feelings the last time he was on my screen, I’m oddly pleased.

K: It’s so weird that I’m thrilled to see him. I don’t know how to feel about it.

After the credits (which I’ve just noticed STILL feature Phantom Dennis. Awww), Angel stutters a little. “Dad?” Connor says, and the camera pans past Angel to Wes’ clients who call him over. Wes introduces the clients to Angel, and Connor introduces himself, shaking Angel’s hand. Angel looks away awkwardly. Wes starts to fill Angel in, but Angel interrupts to say that there’s been a mistake and they can’t help. With that, he walks away leaving everyone looking confused.

Angel’s office. Wes tries to sell him on the case, but Angel has no fucks to give other than wondering how they found Wolfram & Hart. Wes says that they should really help because, you know, WE HELP THE HELPLESS and plus, they seem like good people. Angel mutters, “We all know what this place does to good people…” With that, we cut to White Picket Hell. The Chain Face Demon drops a fresh heart onto the pile and the camera pans up to show Gunn lying dead on the table, chest splayed open. The demon starts to clean his knife and Gunn’s chest miraculously heals. He sits bolt upright with a shout, and looks around him in confusion. The demon hands him an oven bulb and Gunn calls out to his Hell-Wife that he’s found it. He turns and heads back upstairs.

Lor: Yeah, fuck the Hellburbs. It’s actually pretty damn sadistic to have this layer of “normal life” on top of the daily torture.

K: In some ways, it’s WORSE than the torture, because he’s literally living the same day over and over and the only thing that changes is how he’s tortured.

Back in LA, Spike flies across a room. The camera pans out to reveal that Illyria’s responsible and that they’re in a training room with weapons-covered walls. Spike gets up and says they need to establish some ground rules: “First off, no more punching me in the face. Secondly, when I punch you in the face, you tell me how you feel so I can write that down on my clipboard. Third? No touching my clipboard.” (S: This was actually adorable. Guys, I just used the word “adorable” to describe a Spike scene. I don’t even know who I am anymore.)(L: The same person who didn’t mind seeing Connor, apparently. Everything is weird.) (K: SO WEIRD.) Illyria says that hurting him is fun, and snap kicks him in the face. He punches her in response, but she barely reacts. Then Illyria backhands him across the room with a smirk. Wes walks in and informs Spike that the room has automated training devices that they could use rather than him getting kicked all over the place, but Spike is bizarrely okay with it.

Sweeney: I was expecting a general, “Fuck this task!” reaction but it actually makes all kinds of sense.

K: True. Illyria notes that Wes is frustrated, and he spills the beans on his argument with Angel. Spike sasses, and Illyria says that in the good old days, a leader would have killed both of them for their insolence. Wes says that he’s not being insolent, he just doesn’t always understand Angel’s choices, and he hopes Angel knows what he’s doing. Cut to Angel’s office, where he’s yelling at Jayne. He wants to know why the Senior Partners have backed out on their deal regarding Connor. Jayne says that they aren’t behind Connor’s reappearance, and that someone out there is trying to send Angel a pretty major message, and they’re using Connor to do so.

Lor: In sort of a throwaway line, Jayne tells Angel that he’s not a little girl and he won’t fuck him on the couch. Man, this show doesn’t do women well. Eve was immortal, in the same position as Jayne and as far as we know, had all the same abilities. But she’s a “little girl” because she has a vagina and once used it. Her downfall was, of course, falling in love. STOP IT, SHOW.

K: Ugh. That’s a good and also gross point.

Cut to Connor and his Shiny New Parents driving through LA. He tells them that he knows they went to Wolfram & Hart because of the creepy van thing, and that they should be happy that he’s okay. They pull into a motel parking lot (S: IS IT THE SAME ONE HOLTZ STAYED IN?) (K: I don’t think so, unfortunately. That would have been perfect), and Connor starts to reassure his Shiny New Parents. But he’s interrupted by a demon with a ponytail ripping the door off the car and throwing him across the parking lot. Other ponytail demons go after the Shiny New Parents. Connor gets up and starts fighting. Shiny New Father tries to help him, but gets knocked to the ground. When Connor sees them go after his Shiny New Mother, he gets so freaked that he punches a ponytail demon clear across the parking lot. He stares at his hands in confusion, then gets tackled by a Mario Jumping ponytail demon. Connor cowers, but Angel appears to save the day. He fights all the ponytail demons simultaneously, ending by slamming one into the ground. Connor looks on in shock before saying “THAT WAS AWESOME” with a grin. Fade to black.

Lor: I’ve got to admit, the pause before Angel breaks the demon across his knee and the single, sitcom-ish DUN! that sounds when Connor says the death was awesome, all entertained me greatly.

K: YUP. After the Not Commercial Break, Connor gushes some more about how cool it was, and Angel’s all “aww shucks.” It’s kind of adorable. (S: There’s a surprising amount of adorable happening in this episode. My emotions are confused.) The Shiny New Parents walk up, and Connor rushes over because his Shiny New Father is hurt. Angel says they have medical services at Wolfram & Hart, and also that they should probably talk. Connor looks pointedly at the dead ponytail demons with a “Yeah, I kinda figured.

Back at Wolfram & Hart, Angel assures Connor that his Shiny New Father is in good hands. He tells Connor that demons are real, and Connor asks if he’s a demon. Angel looks like he’s been stabbed in the feels for a second before he says that Connor’s just a well-adjusted kid with “enhanced abilities.” Connor asks if Angel’s a vampire, and Angel nods slowly. Connor takes it all in his stride and then starts asking questions about being a vampire. He gushes about how cool it must be to work in a place where everyone’s a superhero. I’m calling Avengers shots because REASONS. (L: I think you say this once per one of your recaps.) (K: I’m taking advantage of these opportunities while they still exist, Lor.)

Anyway, Angel says that it’s mostly pretty boring, so of course that’s Spike’s cue to be thrown through a door by Illyria. He storms back into the room screaming abuse, and Angel asks Connor if he wants to meet some of Angel’s coworkers. They walk into the training room to see Illyria with one foot on Spike’s head. Connor asks what Illyria is, and Angel basically shrugs because he has no idea. Connor asks if she has powers, and Spike flips through his clipboard while telling them what he’s discovered about Illyria so far: she can hit like a truck, alter the flow of time, and maybe talk to plants. Illyria chimes in that she’d like to keep Spike as her pet. (S: I LOL’d. I continue to have all my feelings about questionable writing decisions that got us here, but Amy Acker is killing this role.) Angel introduces Connor to them, and he gets an Awkward Boner over Illyria’s outfit. He murmurs to Angel that he’s always had a thing for older women. I throw up in my mouth a little.  (L: TOO SOON.) Angel mutters “They were supposed to fix that…” under his breath.

Lorne enternounces that Wes has something on the demons that he needs Angel to see. They head out, Connor trailing behind them saying that this is way cooler than college. Angel asks about college, and Connor says that he’s a student at Stanford. Angel’s not-so-secretly psyched.

Upstairs in Angel’s office, Wes hands out photos of the ponytail demons. He says that they’re the minions of a warlock named Cyvus Vail. Angel drops the pictures and heads for the door, saying that he’s going to have a chat with said warlock. Wes tries to convince him to wait until they’ve done more research or at least to wait for back up. But Angel has no fucks to give, yelling at Wes before he heads out. Lorne and Connor awkward turtle in the background as Wes looks murder-facey. Cut to Wes’ office. He storms over to his desk and makes a call, asking for everything they can find on Cyvus Vail.

Lor: We touched on this in a recent comment section, but it’s interesting to see Wesley coming back to this place. He’s pretty much researching Angel’s son, even if he doesn’t know it, and this is what got him into all that trouble in the first place.

K: True. It gives a recycled feeling with a side of OH GOD NO.

Cut to a fancy looking room. A semi-demon looking dude with red skin sits in a swanky chair, hooked up to several IVs. A ponytail demon comes flying across the room, and Angel stalks in. In a vaguely Yoda-esque voice, Vail tells Angel that he wasn’t trying to kill Connor. He just wanted Connor to know what he was capable of. Angel wants to know how Vail even knows about Connor, and he replies “I built him.

Back in Wes’ office, he and Lorne are going through the files on Vail. Harmony comes in with more files and also Illyria who’s been wandering around in HR. Lorne discovers a bunch of information on Vail from accounts payable, and says that it looks like he was Wolfram & Hart’s go-to guy for memory restructuring and mind control. He flips a page and is staggered by the amount they paid him for one particular job. Wes looks at it, and says that it wasn’t just Vail, it was also some of the most powerful sorcerers on the west coast, and that they were probably performing something like a reality shift. They both stop in surprise when they realise that the big mojo took place on the day they took over Wolfram & Hart.

Sweeney: WOMP. Angel should have added some sort of, “Also keep no records of this,” clause. Shit. Amateur.

Lor: At least don’t file the damn paperwork in the regular filing cabinets.

K: Seriously.

Rolling in Cash Room. Angel yanks out Vail’s IV and starts to choke him. But he stops when Vail starts talking about Connor getting lost in a department store when he was five. Angel realises that Vail’s the one who built all of Connor’s memories. Vail says that Connor’s some of his best work. Angel asks what he wants, and Vail says he wants someone dead: Sahjahn. (Remember him?!) (S: Yeah! WEIRD.) Angel’s all “Ugh, fuck. Not that dude again” and says that he trapped Sahjahn in an urn. Vail pulls out said urn and says that it’s not enough because urns can be broken and he prefers finality.

He waves a hand and conjures up a cube that looks a lot like it’s got a tealight candle inside it. “Do you know what an Orlon Window is, Angel?” Vail asks. He doesn’t give Angel a chance to reply, going on to say that if one were broken near someone with fake memories, they’d remember the truth. Angel glares at him and steps forward towards the tealight candle cube. Vail makes it vanish and implies that he can return Connor’s memories faster than Angel can kill him. Angel backs off, and sighs that he’ll kill Sahjahn. Vail informs him that’s not possible because there’s a Contrivance Prophecy that says only Connor can kill Sahjahn. So now that Connor’s all fluffy and human and college-attend-y, Angel has to turn him back into a killer. Womp womp.

After the Not Commercial Break, Angel hands Connor a “So, You’re In An Ancient Prophecy” pamphlet. I’m totally kidding, but he should really get those made up.  It would save a lot of time. (L: A+) Connor, understandably, is all “LOL WHUT.” Wes wants to know why they’re even listening to Vail on account of he did some big massive spell they don’t understand. Angel looks guilty. Connor interrupts, wanting to know if Sahjahn is super strong. Wes says that the last time they fought, Angel nearly died. Angel insists that this is different because Connor’s a special snowflake. Wes argues for more time, but Angel says they don’t have any. Connor asks if Vail will leave him and his family alone if Sahjahn is dead. Angel nods, and Connor looks determined. “What are we waiting for?” he says coldly.

Sweeney: Seeing this written out evoked, “Right, I remember how he’s a twisted little psycho,” thoughts, but seeing it? I really like fluffy Connor! Send him back to his home to be fluffy and not terrible!

K: Agreed. White Picket Hell. Chain Face Demon heads towards Gunn with a red hot poker and Gunn screams. Just before the poker makes contact, Jayne interrupts, saying that he needs a minute. Chain Face Demon heads off to the corner and Jayne rips off Gunn’s ugly ass necklace. He introduces himself and says that he can help Gunn get out of there, that he’s been to Wolfram & Hart and the Fang Gang don’t seem to care about saving him. There’s just a small thing that Gunn has to do for them… Gunn has no fucks to give. He puts his necklace back on, and lies back down, calling out to Chain Face Demon to get on with the heart chopping.

Sweeney: Well, shit, Gunn. That’s hardcore. And I kind of love him for it.

Lor: I know the last shady deal he made led to Fred’s death, but when faced with hot poker or another shady deal, you’ve got to really, really have learned your lesson. I feel for him.

K: It really says something about how deep Gunn’s guilt is that he chooses the torture.

Training Room. Angel tells Connor that he’ll be right there with him, but Connor says he has to do it his way. Although he has no idea what that is. He heads over to the wall and wonders if he should take a weapon with him, then promptly knocks a bunch of them to the floor because apparently Not!Evil Connor is hella clumsy. Angel gives him a pep talk about how he’s faster than Sahjahn and less likely to have read The Big Book of Villain Gloating. He tells Connor to hit quick and keep moving. Connor asks if Angel thinks he can do this, and Angel replies “I know you can.

Wolfram & Hart Archives. Wes feverishly searches through files as Illyria asks why he’s so concerned because the world is a giant ball of change and every change is a point of experience. Wes disagrees, and Illyria says that Fred changed when her memories did. Wes is all “Skkkrrrtt, WHAT.” He asks if she can see what the memories were before, but she can’t. Luckily, Wes finds the right file. He starts to read as Illyria babbles in the background, asking if Fred’s still the person Wes thought she was now that he knows her memories were changed. “No. None of us are...” he says before rushing out of the room. Illyria follows, and the zoomy cameraman zooms in on Angel’s signature on the file.

Rolling in Cash Room. Connor and Angel walk in, and Vail welcomes them. Connor’s all “EW, GROSS” and gets all up in Vail’s face, saying that this is a one time deal, and that if Vail comes near him or his family once Sahjahn is dead, he’ll murder his face off. Angel looks surprised and/or confused.

I don’t blame him, because that speech starts out threatening but rapidly turns to “I have no fucking clue what I’m doing”. Heh. Vail points Connor at the urn, and Angel pep talks him some more. “Dude, you’re starting to freak me out…” Connor says. Angel apologises, fixes Connor’s collar, and sends him on his way. Angel looks like a nervous soccer mum, and I know we literally just had a gif set, but LOOK:

Connor reaches the table with the urn, which also features a bunch of weapons. He turns to ask Angel what to do, but a wall has sprung up between them.

Sweeney: I missed Papa Angel. Just after the ballet is pretty much the moment this show turned to shit for me, but there were a few bright spots between then and these recent good episodes and Angel’s anxious excitement over being a dad was in that category.

K: YES. Angel’s confused, because he can still see and hear Connor. Vail says creepily that he had to do it because he can’t risk Sahjahn getting loose and killing him. But he’s sure Connor will do Angel proud. Angel looks worried. Connor nervously pulls the lid off the urn and Sahjahn appears. He thanks Connor and grants him three wishes, and Connor’s all “Wait, really??” But no. Sahjahn’s just fucking with him. Connor tells him that they’re supposed to fight, and Sahjahn peers at him before realising who he is. Connor’s oddly adorable, saying “Yeah. I’m me. Hi. You can take a moment, if you want. There’s some weapons and stuff over here if you think you’ll need them,” with absolutely no conviction in his voice. (S: It’s kind of sassy and funny. New Connor is so much better. Not that that’s hard.)

On the other side of the wall, Angel’s wringing his hands, saying that he told Connor not to fall for the talking.

Lor: I thought this was more for battle strategy, like don’t let him lull you, but I’m thinking now he meant it more because he didn’t want Connor to learn anything from Sahjahn. Smart.

K: A little from Column A and a little from Column B, perhaps.

Sahjahn asks Connor how Quor-Toth was, and he’s all “Uuuuuuuuuuuh. Fine??” Sahjahn thought Connor would be more intimidating. Connor says he’s learning, but apparently not fast enough because Sahjahn snaps a punch and Connor goes down. Angel tries to rush to his aid, but he can’t get through the invisi-wall.

Connor pulls himself upright and says “Ow! That really hurt!” in this hilariously indignant voice. Sahjahn sasses him and throws a few more punches. Connor ducks the first couple and lands one of his own before Sahjahn knocks him down again. Angel demands that Vail open the door, but Vail conjures the tealight candle cube again and says that Connor had to grow up sooner or later and that Angel should just watch it happen. Connor throws another punch, but Sahjahn catches his hand and starts tossing him all over the room. Angel turns to Vail again and sees that he’s frozen in time, the tealight candle cube gone.

He looks around the room to see Illyria and a very pissed off Wesley, who’s holding the cube. Wes coldly says that Angel changed the world and sold them out. Angel begs for the cube, and Wes asks “Is this your thirty pieces of silver?” Angel steps towards Wes, and Illyria backhands him across the room, saying that Wes doesn’t follow him any more. In the next room, Sahjahn tosses Connor around some more. Prophecies, he says, are overrated.

Angel quietly tells Wes that Connor is his son. Wes looks momentarily confused, then coldly asks if Fred was the price, if Angel knew what was going to happen to her. Angel is horrified at the concept. He tells Wes that he can explain, Wes just needs to put down the tealight candle box. Wes angrily asks if the box will undo what he thinks Angel has done, if it will bring Fred back. Angel tells him that it won’t, and Wes says “Let’s find out.” He goes to throw the cube down, and Angel desperately asks Wes to trust him. Wes says that he can’t, not any more. He smashes the cube, and a burst of yellow light flings everyone back. Fade to black.

After the Not Commercial Break, we get a bunch of intercut flashbacks with dramatic music over the top to fill in newbies on what happened in seasons 3 and 4. (S: Weird shit, man. I don’t even know and I recapped it.) (L: Maybe one of us made a deal to have our memories wiped!) (K: Or we ODed on Brain Bleach.) Wes wakes with a start, memories intact. He stares at Angel in shock. Angel jumps up and rushes towards Connor. Sahjahn has him pinned to the table, choking him. But Connor grabs Sahjahn by the throat and tosses him across the room. He stands, murder face back on, and attacks. The fight is pretty even for a moment there until Connor stuns Sahjahn with a gut punch, grabs an axe and chops his head off. He stands there, panting. Angel realises the barrier between the rooms is gone and rushes towards his son.

He hesitates as he draws close, but when Connor turns, he’s all “Holy crap, that was craaaaazy!” He tells Angel that he doesn’t like people touching his neck, and also could they please leave because he’d like to see his Shiny New Parents. The whole fighting thing, he says, isn’t for him. Angel’s confused and saddened by Connor’s lack of memories.

Wes’ office. Illyria asks him if he’s the real him again now that he remembers being a dirty child-stealing betrayer. This is really rough, because Wes’ life was already in the shit following Fred’s death and now it’s gotten a million times worse because he’s got a crapton of added guilt. It’s also interesting to note that all the flashback memories included Baby!Connor, Wes getting his throat slit, Quor-Toth!Connor, Justine, Lilah and Jasmine but NO CORDELIA I AM NOT OKAY WITH THIS. (S: UNACCEPTABLE.)(L: I understood that what we saw is just what was taken from them. Cordelia memories were more or less intact.) (K: That kind of makes sense, but also not because the memory wipe would mean rewriting the entire Jasmine storyline somehow…) Illyria says there are two sets of memories and she doesn’t know which ones are real. Wes tells her to focus on the fake ones, because they were created for a reason – so that they could survive. (L: Whatevs. Still not okay that Angel did this.)

Connor walks in to Angel’s office, and they have a cute little jokey moment about vampire safe glass. Angel asks how Shiny Happy Father is, and Connor says he’s fine and being released, but also super-pissed because he told his dad about the demon killing. Angel looks serious, and Connor’s all “LOL, JK.” I like College Student Connor a lot more than any of the other Connors we’ve seen so far. (S: YES.) (L: +1) Angel, relieved, asks Connor what he’s going to tell his Shiny New Parents. Connor replies that he’ll tell them that he’s special and they don’t need to worry about him, especially now that he has Angel looking out for him.

Angel says that he should be careful because they haven’t found Vail yet. Connor smirks and says that he’s not worried because “Nothing he can show me I haven’t already seen.” Angel looks massively confused by this. Connor says that he just wanted to say goodbye. Angel asks if he has to go so soon, and Connor replies that he has to look out for his parents, because this isn’t his world.

 

There’s a glimmer of realisation in Angel’s eyes, but Connor turns and walks towards the elevator. Angel watches him leave. When the elevator arrives, Connor glances back and makes eye contact with Angel. Then he gets into the elevator and leaves. Fade to black.

I actually really enjoyed this episode. Sure, it’s clunky in a “shit, we’ve been cancelled and now only have five episodes to wrap up a whole show” way, what with bringing back Connor and Sahjahn and Wes’ memories all at once. And it kind of bugs me that Gunn and Lorne won’t remember what happened. They have every right to their own memories as well, and this means that Wes is once again shouldering a massive burden alone. I liked Connor for the first time ever, and I was kind of impressed at Vincent Kartheiser’s acting abilities, because the difference between preppy awkward dork Connor and Quor-Toth raised murder face Connor was pretty staggering. Who knew he had it in him?!

Sweeney: YES to all of these things. I was stunned by how much I appreciated Connor in this episode and that little goodbye moment was lovely. That whole S3-4 reminder was crazy, though. I’m also still trying to suppress those memories in order to survive, Wes.

Lor: Wesley is pretty fascinating to me in all of this. He says to Illyria that we are more than just our memories. And while the taking of his memories certainly had an effect on his development, we’ve seen flashes of all those Wesleys he forgot he already once was: drunk and grieving, questioning Angel, taking matter into his own hands. 

In the end, they get their memories back, but what Angel did still has a consequence. It seems the memories are sort of diluted by the fake ones, giving Wesley a crutch to lean on and away from the impact of his actions, and Connor an out to go on living his new life. What was taken from them was not fully returned, and I really liked that, story wise.

On the other end of this, while (mostly) everyone is getting their memories back, we see Gunn willingly shutting his off. Rough.

On the whole, though, I was totally glued to this episode. I’m so glad we are ending our journey with this series with episode we can actually enjoy. WHO KNEW.

 

Next time: Illyria breaks Gunn out of White Picket Hell, and Wes discovers that he’s potentially in for even more Fred-related trauma in Angel S05 E19 – Time Bomb.

 

K (all posts)

I'm a 30-something librarian and I still live with my parents because I'm super broke. Leader of Team Heartless Cow. I have an inexplicable love for 90s television, eat too much chocolate, and read more than is good for me.





Nicole Sweeney (all posts)

Nicole is the co-captain of Snark Squad and these days she spends most of her time editing podcasts. She spends too much time on Twitter and very occasionally vlogs and blogs. In her day job she's a producer, editor, director, and sometimes host of educational YouTube channels. She loves travel, maps, panda gifs, and semicolons. Writing biographies stresses her out; she crowd sourced this one years ago and has been using a version of it ever since. She would like to thank Twitter for their help.





Marines (all posts)

I'm a 30-something south Floridan who loves the beach but cannot swim. Such is my life, full of small contradictions and little trivialities. My main life goals are never to take life too seriously, but to do everything I attempt seriously well. After that, my life goals devolve into things like not wearing pants and eating all of the Zebra Cakes in the world. THE WORLD.





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