Dear Traumateers,
Lorraine: In some offline news, I joined a local book club this past month! If I’m honest, I had a big worry about the people I would encounter there. I mean, I knew pretty quickly that they were lovely girls, very smart and well spoken with great taste in beer and good conversation. Still, there was that niggling fear in the back of my mind. I waited for my moment, and as soon as I saw it, I went for it: So, what did you guys think of Fifty Shades of Grey?
Lucky for me, the two girls who’d actually read the book hated it and everything was safe. I exhaled loudly and rushed through an explanation about how I spent almost two years recapping that book chapter by chapter.
Sweeney: (1) Necessary introduction to any book club I may consider joining at any point in time. -and- (2) Having had to explain that to people on multiple occasions: it’s so awkward. “But why would you do that?” “I don’t know, man. I don’t know.”
Lor: It’s amazing to me the ways that this blog bleeds into our offline lives and how it continues to grow in every regard. In case you’ve never heard the story one of the million times we’ve repeated it, this blog started off as a book recapping blog named Childhood Trauma. It was May, two years ago, that we relaunched it as SnarkSquad.com. Sweeney and I spent a solid few minutes laughing over that announcement post recently, partly because of her unknowingly making disparaging remarks about season four of Buffy and partly because we assure everyone it was just “some” change. Very minimal change.
Ha.
Sweeney: Haaaaaaaa
Lor: I am both overwhelmed by the history contained here in this blog and really freakin’ excited about what’s to come. I’m kind of jumping the gun here, but in between her like 87 additional trips this month (S: This is not much of an overstatement. My bed and I are experiencing separation anxiety.), Sweeney and I talked a lot about what’s coming up next for Snark Squad. It’s another healthy heaping of “some” change, but fingers crossed it turns out just as well.
Last Month:
In LA, we get some Crossover Magic when an unhinged Slayer goes on a rampage and Andrew comes to collect her. We celebrate the 100th episode of the show with the (all too brief) return of Cordelia, who helps Angel gain some life perspective. Then, a Nazi submarine full of vampires. BUT THEN, PUPPETS. Fred is happy for one second, but she’s also infected with demon dust. She dies and Illyria takes up in her body. Illryia tries to go over to her old temple only to find it in ruins so she decides to hang out with the Fang Gang since she has nothing better to do. Angel looks for Lindsey in a hell dimension, but they have to leave Gunn behind. Turns out all Lindsey knows is that the apocalypse is now. CONNOR! shows up again when his parents turn to W&H for help, and Wesley figures out what Angel did to their memories and gets them back.
Season two of Orphan Black started off with Sarah dressing up as Cosima in order to get close enough to Rachel to punch her in the face. Sarah finds Kira and Mrs. S, only to steal Kira back. Meanwhile, Helena got stolen by the Proletheans Who Heart Science. Sarah takes Kira to her dad’s house and Daniel finds them there. Helena escapes the Proletheans, and when Sarah is recaptured by Daniel, it’s Helena who shows up to rescue her.
Season four of Game of Thrones kept right on rolling to very mixed reviews, as we got another helping of rape at Craster’s Keep and Lady Olenna Tyrell confessed to her part in killing Joffrey. Jon Snow inadvertently frees Bran from the Keep and Sansa makes it to her creepy aunt Lysa’s house. Tyrion goes on trial and after Shae lies as a witness, he gives the best, badass speech. Oberyn volunteers to be Tyrion’s champion and Littefinger kills the crap out of Lysa.
The Winchester boys first head to Missouri where they encounter a probably racist ghost truck. Sam has a premonition about a kid who might kill his whole family and finds out he move things with his mind. We take a break from the Supernatural when the boys discover a bunch of hillbillies who like to eat people.
Meanwhile, over in Neptune, Keith tries to find the missing daughter of a rap mogul and Logan deals with Lisa Rinna’s death by being sassy. Veronica defends a teacher accused of sexual harassment only to discover the student wasn’t telling a full lie. Logan thinks his mom is still alive, but it just turns out to be his sister mooching off the credit cards.
Even though we kept telling the Pretty Little Liars that Nate is not Maya’s cousin, Emily goes on a murder trip with. Nate ends up dead and surprise! Mona’s been sneaking out of the hospital to meet with TOBY. For Halloween, the girls ride a ghost train that has Adam Lambert and someone trying to kill them. Mona’s released from Radley and gains the sympathy of pretty much everyone.
We posted the recap blog for the April #snarkathon (Ever After) as well as the May (Mean Girls). Both instant classics.
Plus, we finally wrapped up Firefly officially by posting the long but emotional recap for Serenity.
Coming Up:
So many things that I already flailed about it in the introduction. Here’s the deal:
We have six active shows on the website right now. Of those, Angel will finish (FINISH!!!) in June, and Orphan Black and Game of Thrones will both go back on hiatus. We have slots to fill and so, so many ideas on how to fill them.
These things will all be rolled out over the next three or four months. We aren’t trying to tease you, we just want you to know that new things are coming, but we want to make sure to plan them properly.
Sweeney: We also remember that one time when we promised you a new show and then it took two months for it to happen. We’re a little anxious now. We just like to make sure that if we promise you a thing, then the thing is really going to happen. Also sometimes we get ideas and it’s like, “Hey, girls, you can’t do that for at least another three months,” and we’re all, “BUT WE’RE EXCITED NOW,” but somehow we keep ourselves in check. By which I mean we send each other 150% more emails than usual.
Sorry, that explanation got away from me. tl;dr we get blog ideas and we flail about them.
Lor: SO. In June: expect us to focus on wrapping up the series mentioned above. We’ll celebrate Angel and generally have a grand time finishing things. You know how much we love dance gifs.
On top of that here are three things we are ready to announce:
1 – The OC recaps are coming during the summer. It’ll be a little different than anything we’ve ever done on this website, so be excited.
b – Segue Magic, our weekly vlog series, is making a comeback. What things would you like to hear the Snark Ladies talk about? Give us some topic suggestions in the comments.
cat – The June #snarkathonwill be on Saturday, June 7th at 8pm GMT (that’s 4pm EDST). Thanks to the poll we ran, we will be watching Bring it On.
Welcome Questionable New Friends:
Sometimes our dear web-searchers just have really good questions.
For instance, someone in Amity Gardens wants to know, “if it was so hot in amends why was buffy wearing a coat.” Was it hot in Amends? I can’t remember 73% of everything I saw during Buffy. But keep questioning her wardrobe, friend. Always.
Someone in Bowling Green wants to know, “cane or cat.” That depends, dear. Do you need help walking or are you looking for a companion?
Finally, someone in Elizabeth wants to know, “in the novel fifty shades of grey the safe words yellow and red means what.” As shocking as this sounds, yellow means slow down and red means stop. Don’t feel dumb about asking the question either, because after three books in the series, Ana never really got it either.
Welcome to Traumaland!
♥
The Snark Squad