Previously: Principal Green got fired because of asshattery. Also, Pacey had total heart-eyes and Jen was the bestest friend of ever.
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Cinderella Story
Kirsti: We open in the Witter Jeep, with Pacey driving Joey to the train station. She gushes about how she’ll finally get to use those dance lessons they took, and Pacey squints at an ornate invitation. Apparently AJ has won a creative writing award and there’s a big celebration and dancing?? I’m as confused as Pacey is. He grumbles about it, then tells Joey to ignore him and have a good time.
Democracy Diva: The dancing thing is dumb and only exists so the Powers that Be Contriving can name this episode Cinderella Story.
K: Truth.
Joey gushes some more about how she never gets invited to elegant dinners and that it’s nice to have a friend to go with. Pacey scoffs at her calling her relationship with AJ friendship, and she glowers that her relationship is none of his business. She wibbles about long distance relationships operating under different rules to regular ones. Yeah, that whopping HOUR from Boston to Cape Cod is totally long distance, Joey. Pacey snarks that a long distance relationship is perfect for Joey because it’s not real. It’s a fairytale. Joey smiles and says that sometimes wishes come true. Pacey tells her that reality always finds a way through. She gives him judgey face and heads to the train. Pacey facepalms a little.
HEY YEAH YEAH YEAH.
After the credits, we’re at Gail’s new restaurant, which has a big “OPENING SOON” banner over the door. Apparently it opens in less than a week and she doesn’t have a chef. GOOD WORK, GAIL. (D: You are actually good at journalism, Gail. Maybe go do that instead of something you know literally nothing about.) Dawson points out that they also don’t have menus. Gail tastes some chowder, and suggests they steal Bodie away from the B&B. Dawson points out that Joey will hate him forever if that happens. Gail rushes off to the printer to sort out the menus and tells him to go through some resumes looking for possible waitstaff.
Jack and Andie come in with the official restaurant sign, but there’s a problem: Gail didn’t decide on a name yet, so the sign just has a fish on it. Andie suggests that they make the restaurant a trendy, no-name place. Dawson sighs. Another potential chef arrives, this one with a stereotypical Eastern European accent.
Elsewhere, Pacey’s about to meet the kid he’s supposed to mentor. A social worker type introduces him to Buzz Thompson, and it’s the kid from Jerry Maguire!
The kid totally sasses him, and Pacey’s all “Ohhhh, this is why they paired us together”. The kid yells “I’m not like one of those kids on Seventh Heaven, and I’m not like you, Pissy“. I may have snort laughed. Buzz says he gives it 48 hours before Pacey tries to get rid of him. Pacey stares at the social worker type, who smirks.
Diva: My exact notes read: OMG IT’S THE KID FROM JERRY MAGUIRE THIS KID IS AWESOME AND WE GET TO SEE PACEY INTERACT WITH CHILDREN AND JOSHUA JACKSON MAKES MY OVARIES FALL OUT.
K: An excellent and very accurate note.
Meanwhile, Joey’s arrived in Boston and spots a sign being held over the crowd that reads “Potter, Joseph“. But it’s not AJ. It’s a hot blonde girl. Joey’s confused. Hot Blonde introduces herself as Morgan, AJ’s oldest friend. AJ is apparently still deciding what piece to read at the gala, so he sent Morgan instead. She says that he’s told her all about Joey. Joey still looks confused, even more so when Morgan hands her a pair of roller blades. Which is fair, because roller blading in Boston in winter seems like a fucking terrible idea.
Diva: If a stranger handed me a pair of roller blades I would just stare at them until they ran away.
K: YUP. Or skated away, as the case may be. Incidentally, I tried to find a picture of Morgan to put in here, but all Google gave me was pictures of Abby Morgan and now I have a sad because Abby was so much more interesting than half the plotlines we’ve dealt with this season. SIGH.
I mean, just look at her outfit/hair. AMAZING.
Back in Capeside, Pacey and Buzz are at an arcade. Buzz complains about how totally boring the arcade is, and Pacey asks what he wants. “Read my lips: Pikachu,” he replies. When Pacey doesn’t know what that is, Buzz tells him “Your generation is so out of it!“. LOL. And also not wrong. I still don’t understand anything about Pokemon. (D: Neither do I, but future Mr. Diva and his 5-year-old nephew bond over their shared love of Pokemon, so I was on board for this.) He directs Pacey to a kiosk where he can buy the specific trading card Buzz wants, and Pacey hands him some change to go play Whack-a-Mole until he gets back. Two seconds later, Buzz is using the Whack-a-Mole mallet to beat up other kids, despite the fact that he’s like three inches tall. Pacey picks him up and carries him out.
Cut to AJ scribbling away in a coffee shop. Joey and Morgan turn up, still on roller blades, and he apologises for not being able to meet her at the station. She says she understands, and they kiss. Morgan tells them to get a room. They bicker back and forth, and Joey asks how long they’ve known each other. AJ says they grew up together until Morgan decided to go to college in Paris. Morgan says Joey was all he wrote about in his letters, and that she’s pretty sure AJ never mentioned her to Joey. AJ looks awkward. Morgan bails, and Joey and AJ smile awkwardly at each other. Fade to black.
After the Not Commercial Break, Jack and Andie are tasting food at the restaurant. Apparently it’s all gross. Jack says that Gail needs serious help. Jen walks in, and they mock her for her frequent absences since she started dating Henry. She takes it on the chin, and says that she’s actually there for a waitressing job. Dawson asks how soon she can start, because apparently it’s totally fine for a 16 year old to be hiring people on behalf of his mother.
Diva: This restaurant was built on a foundation of contrivance. Nothing about this will ever make any sense.
K: They should just name it Contrivance Central and be done with it.
Back in Boston, AJ doctors Joey’s scraped knee while she awkwardly brings up how pretty and smart Morgan is. She asks why he didn’t tell her about Morgan, and he said that they have so little time together that he thought it was better to focus on the big things. She’s confused that one of his oldest friends isn’t considered a big thing, and he points out that she doesn’t talk about her friends much either. Joey acquiesces, and he goes back to trying to decide which piece to read.
But Joey isn’t done. She asks if he and Morgan ever dated. He sighs and says she has nothing to worry about. He gives up on the antibacterial cream and says he knows something that will work better. He leans in and kisses her knee, then kisses her and all I can think about is how nasty that antibacterial cream would taste. (D: And if you’re worried about germs, which is like all they’re talking about, don’t kiss open wounds.)
Yes, I’m breaking this out again.
Morgan bursts in and starts to say something, then backs out awkwardly.
Diva: At some point, I noticed that AJ has a Liz Phair poster and I laughed. Just thought I should mention it.
K: YES. It’s been a while since we’ve mentioned our favourite set designer, but they did good work with that one.
AJ asks what she was saying, and she tells him to go with a specific one of his older pieces to show them how well rounded he is. She also judges his selected outfit and tells him to dress like himself. Joey looks awkward, and Morgan says she has something for Joey too. She grabs Joey’s hand and pulls her down the hall.
Meanwhile, Pacey’s taken Buzz to the boatyard and wants him to help paint the True Love. He demonstrates and Buzz tells him he’s doing it wrong. Apparently his dad taught him how to paint. Pacey asks where his dad is, and Buzz says he’s somewhere in the Atlantic because they scattered his ashes off Nantucket. Pacey awkwards. Buzz asks where Pacey’s dad is, and when Pacey says his father’s a cop, Buzz grins and says “That explains your authority issues!“. This kid is utterly ridiculous, and while I kind of hate this storyline, I can’t help but love that Pacey’s finally met his sassy match.
Diva: I fully love this storyline. I know this kid is just a plot device to move Pacey’s feelings for Joey forward, but he’s fucking insane and completely adorable and I love their dynamic.
K: Pacey insists he doesn’t have authority issues, and tells Buzz that he’s the one with issues on account of playing “Whack-a-Kid” at the arcade. Buzz sassily asks how Pacey got stuck in the program, and Pacey reluctantly admits that he hit someone. Buzz makes a run for it and Pacey grabs him and heaves him over one shoulder as Buzz calls him a “hypocritical maniac“. LOL.
In Morgan’s dorm room, she informs Joey that AJ’s real name is Arthur Junior, after his father. I suddenly understand why he goes by AJ. Joey looks at a collage of photos that Morgan has on her wall, and gushes about the photos of sidewalk art in Paris. Morgan says they’re hers and that she’s studying photography this semester. She hands Joey a…coat? Cardigan?? IDEK, you guys. She hands her SOME ITEM OF CLOTHING and Joey gushes about how gorgeous it is.
Diva: It looked like a coat, but that doesn’t really explain why any of this is happening.
K: I knew our resident fashion guru would be able to identify said garment! But yes.
Morgan tells her that AJ might wimp out and not show up to the gala, and they giggle together about some of his ridiculous habits. “Yeah, but he can kiss…” Joey finishes, and Morgan stares at the ground. She admits that they kissed once, and they both felt weird afterwards. They decided they knew each other too well and there’s definitely nothing there. Joey looks thoughtful, and asks if Morgan has plans for the following night. She wants Morgan to go with them, because she should be there given that she’s AJ’s oldest friend. Morgan awkwards a little, but clearly appreciates Joey making an effort.
Back in Capeside, Jack and Andie are bailing after bad food overdose. Dawson begs them to stay. Jen collides with another staff member, and plates go flying. She apologies and promises she’ll get better before opening. Gail rushes up and asks if everything’s okay. Mitch walks in and says it’s just waitstaff teething problems. He crouches down next to Jen and offers to show her some plate carrying techniques. She’s relieved.
Gail insists that they have things covered, and Mitch says he can do whatever she needs done because he’s there to work, as requested. Gail’s confused, and Mitch stares at Dawson who stares at Gail who gives Dawson bitchface. Dawson looks awkward.
Boatyard. Buzz demands to be fed, and Pacey hands him a hotdog from the grill. Buzz makes “ew” face and wants to know when he’s going home because his mother’s making meatloaf. Pacey polishes the True Love sign, and Buzz asks who’s the girl he named his boat after. Pacey insists it’s an idea, not a person. Buzz asks who the idea is. Pacey eyerolls a little, and Buzz tells him to just kiss her already because he’s totally pathetic. (D: Hear, hear! Mainly the kissing part!) Pacey snaps and says they’re going home and that maybe tomorrow he won’t turn up. Buzz says that would make his day.
Gala. AJ freaks out a little. A woman introduces him, and as everyone applauds, he asks Joey if they can just run away. She’s all “LOL NOPE” and he heads up to the lectern. Joey smiles as he starts reading his piece, but her smile fades when he looks straight at Morgan while reading about love unspoken. Morgan beams. The more AJ reads, the more it becomes obvious that his story is about Morgan. Joey looks a little heartbroken. Fade to black.
Diva: It’s not even a little bit subtle. He may as well have ended his story with “and her name rhymes with organ.”
K: I was going to make some kind of penis joke here, but it’s 5.52am and I can’t think of anything witty. So just pretend there’s something hilarious here. Okay? Cool.
After the Not Commercial Break, Pacey talks to the social worker about Buzz. She tells him that Buzz has been through four mentors in the past year, that his mother works stupidly long hours, and that his father ran off with a younger woman and started a new family. Pacey’s shocked. She says that Buzz feels rejected and tests all the people in his life to see if they’ll come back. He looks thoughtful. The social worker says she’ll assign him to a new kid straight away, and Pacey insists that he only came in to ask if he could pick Buzz up early tomorrow. She smiles knowingly.
Back at the restaurant, Gail tells Dawson that she’s super pissed about the Mitch thing. He snaps that she needs help because he can’t do everything. She says all she asked him to do was pick waitstaff and taste some food, and says that calling in Mitch would be like him having someone else direct his movie. He shouts that she always taught him to ask for help, and says he doesn’t understand why she can’t take her own advice. It’s kind of valid, but I also want to punch Dawson in the face repeatedly, so…IDK. He storms out.
Diva: I’m more angry about all these idiots trying to open a restaurant without any of this shit worked out in advance. But I’m always glad to punch Dawson in the face.
K: It’s, like, our raison d’etre.
Boston. AJ’s thrilled that the award people gave him a bottle of Dom Perignon. Morgan says Joey’s lucky the heel on her shoe broke because AJ can’t dance for shit. (D: So, all that talk of dancing was for literally no reason at all. Cool.) They reach the point where they should separate and everyone awkwards. Morgan suggests that AJ and Joey go to the arboretum, but Joey puts on her eyebrows of innuendo and says she wants to go back to AJ’s room. He gets all embarrassed but agrees. Morgan smiles painfully and says that she’ll have the arboretum to herself. Joey hands back the coat (it WAS a coat!) Morgan lent her, and Morgan rushes away. Joey takes AJ’s hand and they head upstairs.
In the hall, she stops. He asks what’s wrong, and she asks if he’s feeling guilty about something. He says he just doesn’t like the idea of Morgan being out alone at night. Joey bites her lip and tells AJ to go join Morgan. She’s going to go back to his room alone. AJ’s confused. She tells him that Morgan is his muse and they’re basically perfect for each other. He continues to be confused, asking if Morgan said something about wanting to be more than friends. She tells him that she knows what it’s like to have feelings for someone and not realise it until it’s too late.
Diva: I’m basically yelling PACEY IS YOUR AJ, REALIZE THIS SHIT NOW WOMAN at my screen. Don’t make me play the HE BOUGHT YOU A WALL card.
K: I wasn’t yelling that because there were too many Joey/Dawson vibes about Morgan and AJ, but yes.
She says that she’s saying this based on her life and her experiences, both of which he knows almost nothing about. AJ begs for a chance, and she smiles and says that as exciting as what they have is, it isn’t real. He already has something real. Morgan’s realised it, and that’s why she came back from France. She asks if he can hear it too, and he’s not sure what she’s talking about. She quotes his writing back to him: “The loudest sound of all: love unspoken.”
He claims to have no idea what she’s talking about, and Joey’s all “Christ on a cracker, you’re dense.” She asks why he looked at Morgan during the reading, and he has no idea. She says it’s because the piece is about her. He insists that she’s wrong. Joey tells him to go to Morgan and look at her and realise just how not at all fictional the character in his writing is. He asks what happens with them, and she says she’ll remember it for the rest of her life, but it’s just a memory. He and Morgan are reality.
She walks a few steps away, and AJ looks pained. He says that he thought a broken heart was hyperbole, and Joey tells him that unexplored love is totally worse than a broken heart. She kisses him on the cheek and watches sadly as he walks away, bottle of champagne in his hand. Fade to black.
Diva: Look on the bright side, AJ: at least you have really expensive champagne to get you through the night!
K: And if you go drink it with Morgan, you might get some pity sex!
After the Not Commercial Break, Pacey knocks on a door. Buzz answers and tries to slam the door in Pacey’s face. Pacey tells him that he did good work on the boat, and Buzz sasses “Yeah, if you pay attention, I’ll teach you a thing or two.” Pacey chuckles and invites himself in to make meatloaf and mashed potatoes, just like Buzz claimed his mother was going to make for dinner. As Pacey makes meatloaf, Buzz admits that his father’s not dead. Pacey smiles a little, and says “Her name’s Joey“. Buzz’s face lights up as he asks if she’s hot. Pacey refuses to answer. Look, this storyline gets stupid really fast, but Hanging Out With Small Children Pacey is one of my favourite Paceys.
Diva: YUP YUP THIS YUP CUTE YUP.
K: The zoomy cameraman zooms out and the tinkly piano tinkles as Pacey finally admits that Joey’s so beautiful she makes you weak at the knees and when you look at her, everything is right in the universe.
Buzz asks where she is, and Pacey answers “Right now? She’s probably out having the time of her life…” as he kneads meatloaf.
Diva: It should be noted that “kneading meatloaf” is not a euphemism for anything, but it really sounds like one.
K: Oh. Oh God. That hadn’t occurred to me. Yeah, it’s really not a euphemism. He’s literally got his hands in a bowl of meatloaf.
Cut to the Boston train station. Joey checks the departures board and learns that the next train to Capeside is at 9am. Womp womp. She looks around the station, which is filled with homeless alcoholics, then checks her watch. She tears up a little as she heads to a pay phone and makes a call.
Capeside. Jen finds Dawson by the waterfront and says it looks like he could use a friend. He tells her she’s pretty perceptive for someone who’s in the nauseating love bubble, which is basically exactly what happened in the previous episode too. I hereby declare Jen to be season 3’s MVP! (D: Yes! I follow the Tao of Jen!) She says she overheard his fight with Gail, and then got yelled at herself for breaking more plates.
Dawson insists he was just trying to help Gail, but Jen says he was trying to help himself by putting his family back together. Dawson scoffs and says he knows his parents won’t get back together. Jen says people always return to what they know, then points out the spot where he asked her to dance in the pilot, and tells him that he said he wanted to be “my boy adventure“. Dawson’s grossed out by Past!Dawson’s actions. I am too, to be honest, but then I’m pretty much always grossed out by Dawson’s actions. (D: Past, present, and future actions: Dawson is forever gross.) Jen tells him that while he’s not that naive any more, deep down he’s still full of hope.
Cut to the sun rising over the water. Dawson heads back to the restaurant, which suddenly looks very together. He apologises to Gail and says it looks like she’s doing fine on her own. She hands him a mug, and he sips it. It’s clam chowder, which is apparently super delicious. He wants to know what’s changed since the night before. “You weren’t at Leery’s Fresh Fish,” she says. That is the perfect name for a fishmonger, but a terrible name for a restaurant. He’s surprised because that name was Mitch’s idea. Mitch appears and informs Dawson that Gail’s hired him to be general manager.
Mitch says that his first decision was to tell Gail to make Bodie her partner. He runs the kitchen at nights and provides all his recipes the rest of the time in exchange for 20% of the business. YAY BODIE. (D: I love this!) Gail says that she’s fired Jen, and Dawson’s horrified. But Mitch clarifies that while Jen’s a terrible waitress, she’d be a great hostess. Dawson grins happily at his family being sort of back together.
On a highway bound for Capeside, Joey’s sitting in tearful silence. Pacey asks if she’s ever going to speak again, and begs her to say something. She snaps that he was right. “Pacey Witter: the only person in my life who ever speaks the truth,” she snaps. He says that’s not true, and asks what happened. Joey sighs and tells him that there was another girl, and all she could think about was that reality had broken through, just like Pacey said it would.
It reminded her of everything she doesn’t have. “Keep looking, you’ll find it…” Pacey says hesitantly. Joey scoffs, and says it’s become obvious that she’s not meant to find it. She says there’ve only been two people in her whole life who really knew her. Dawson and… Pacey interrupts to say that AJ didn’t really know her. “I was going to say you, Pacey…” she snaps. He stares at her for a second, then pulls off the road.
Joey’s all “WTF DUDE”. Pacey gets out of the car, and Joey follows. He asks what she meant be that, and she says she meant exactly what she said: he knows her better than anyone. Pacey demands to know why she called him in the middle of the night, him rather than anyone else. “You were the first person that I thought of, Pacey…” she says in confusion. He asks what that means. She thinks for a second and says it means he’s there for her, and that she can talk to him. “Don’t you ever get tired of talking?” he asks.
They bicker back and forth, talking over the top of each other. AND THEN PACEY KISSES HER AND I SCREAM AT MY TELEVISION. Fade to black.
Diva: Kirsti is the captain of this ship, and I am her first mate.
Next time on Dawson’s Creek: Even more squeeing. I know, you wouldn’t think it was possible, but it is in S03 E18 – Neverland.
I'm a 30-something librarian and I still live with my parents because I'm super broke. Leader of Team Heartless Cow. I have an inexplicable love for 90s television, eat too much chocolate, and read more than is good for me.
I'm a J.D. by day/blogger by night who directs her snark and judgment primarily towards celebrities and their many red carpet mishaps. Blogging from the style capital of the world (just kidding - I live in DC), I rant and rave over the best and worst in fashion and pop culture.
