Previously: Drugs, drugs, and a bouncy house. Also, everyone is mad at Jen.
—
You Had Me at Goodbye
Chelsea: Open with Joey in the guidance office, being told by an very well-coiffed counselor that “it suits you,” the ‘it’ in this situation being the panicky doe-eyed look that Joey seems to have as a high school senior applying for colleges. Someone should probably tell the counselor that’s just how her face is, though. Joey makes a crack about just going to clown college but the counselor reassures her that she’s actually doing really well on the whole process. Except, of course, for a completely arbitrary (and possibly made up) peer-review from ‘the person who knows her best’ which will OF COURSE necessitate a choice between Pacey and Dawson. Which, I mean, Pacey is obviously the right choice because always, but Joey seems torn.
(Also, as a side note, the ‘peer review’ part of a college application is something I have NEVER heard of and is basically total bullshit. I’m not sure I’d want to go to a school where my admission was based in part on what another hormonal teenager thought of me as a peer… #never)
Kirsti: Thank you for confirming that the peer review is a totally made up thing, because my notes feature a 5 line rant about your friends having to do work on YOUR college applications because that sounds like a small mountain of bullshit that nobody would actually do, regardless of how much you liked your friends.
Chelsea: HEY YEAH YEAH YEAH.
At House McPhee, Pacey is dropping off a bunch of homework for Andie, who still isn’t going to school because of her stint on ecstacy and passing out in a bounce house. Fair enough. (K: Except for the part that, you know, HER BROTHER COULD BRING HER HOMEWORK TO HER.) But then she notices that, while everyone is coming to visit her, they’re not coming together and not talking about each other. So she rightly intuits that they’re all still blaming Jen. When Andie reminds Pacey that “it takes two to tango,” he reminds her that every tango has a lead, and that maybe some friendships just don’t need fixing. Andie looks heartbroken and the #ominousorchestra plays and… you guys, I have a bad feeling about this episode.
K: My notes say “YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH AND FIX THE BROTP, WITTER”. So yes. Bad feelings.
Chelsea: Mr. Brooks’ house. Dawson is just leaving when Mr. Brooks comes out and says something dickish, which is why he is my favorite. Dawson says that he’s done painting Mr. Brooks’ house, no thanks to his bouts of encouragement, and Mr. Brooks takes an extra long moment to just really crap all over the job Dawson has done (see, told you he’s my favorite). Dawson whines that he just can’t do a better job because he’s got to apply to college. Mr. Brooks gives no shits, though, and tells Dawson that if he wants their deal honored, and doesn’t want Mr. Brooks to press charges, he has to do a better job. Which is damn straight – it’s not Mr.Brooks’ fault Dawson is apparently as awful at time management as he is at everything else, and can’t manage to apply to college with the other free 21 hours of his day.
K: YUP. I also cackled a lot at the part where Mr. Brooks basically said “Wow, if you’re as good at school as you are at painting, your college prospects are in the fucking toilet. LOLOLOLOL,” because it was comedy gold.
Chelsea: Back at Capeside High, my ideal power couple, Jen and Jack, are sharing THE. MOST. INTENSE. Gaze down the hallway at each other. He’s so mad. She’s so sorry, and also so mad that he’s so mad. I’m just over here desperately waiting for them to go back to their love and banter. (K: Saaaaaaaame.) But then Drue (ugh) shows up and I HATE HIM SO MUCH. And fully blame him for the whole Andie thing, even though I guess the point is to not blame anyone but Andie. But still.
Drue literally follows Jen down the hall complaining that because of what happened, none of her friends are talking to him. But they’re not talking to her either, and Drue points out that as much as he might be a dick, he’s a dick that’s always been there for Jen. But my #girlboss Jen is having NONE of that. She reminds him that even if everyone in Capeside stopped speaking to her, she wouldn’t turn to him for comfort. Her mic-drop moment is interrupted, though, by the bell ringing. Drue leaves with the ‘reminder’ that what doesn’t kill him only makes him more diabolical, like he’s Loki or Spike or some such nonsense.
K: When really, he may as well be standing there twirling his moustache while everyone eyerolls.
Chelsea: Witter household. Pacey enters and plasters his face to Joey’s (natch) while also somehow explaining that he’s been with Andie. Gretchen busts in to break up their make-out session because it’s Pacey’s turn to buy groceries, and I’m yet again reminded that Pacey is basically an emancipated minor, which I thought was sooooo cool when I was 17.
Gretchen then sets in on Joey with a “tell me everything,” but I’m confused on two fronts: 1.) Joey was already sitting in her living room, so why didn’t they just talk before Pacey got home and 2.) everything about…what, exactly? What it’s like to make out with your brother. Joey seems unperturbed by the question, though, so she asks Gretchen about how to handle what she calls her “college application dysphoria” because OF COURSE SHE DOES no senior talks like that.
K: I was distracted from how ridiculous the language was by the fact that Gretchen is the only person on this show whose pants actually fit properly. HOW DID SHE ESCAPE THE LATE 90S NIGHTMARE PANTS??
Chelsea: Gretchen tells Joey she’s avoiding the real problem, and that she’s been able to tell since Joey arrived that something’s on her mind. Which, weird, because Joey seems to be acting the exact same, but maybe Gretchen just has magic perception powers. Joey then explains that the only thing she still needs to do to finish her applications is to decide who knows her best and ask them to fill out her peer review. And then they have THE EXACT CONVERSATION OF THE PLOT SUBTEXT. Like, they for-real dialogue speak the underlying internal conflict, just in case you missed it. (K: Hello, Anvil of Obvious Storytelling!) Gretchen tells Joey to ask Dawson, because he knows her best and isn’t just the person she happens to be dating.
House of McPheelings. Andie and Jerky McPhee are watching TV together, only they’re not. Jerky apologizes for being, well, Jerky, and tells Andie that he talked to her principal and because she’s basically a genius, she already has enough credits to graduate. So, would she like to take the rest of the school year off to go to Italy with her aunt? And she acts all conflicted but COME. ON. Talk about your rich white people problems: “Oh, I want to go to Italy for the rest of my senior year, before returning to the stress of an Ivy League education, but I don’t want to leave my friends…”
I should probably be happy for Andie here. Really, I’m just bitter.
K: Whereas over on Team Not From America, I’M SO FUCKING CONFUSED BY ALL OF THIS. Like, if you don’t hand in every piece of school assessed coursework during the year AND sit your education department created end of year exams in Australia? You’re sure as fuck not graduating. (That said, I like that Jerky’s looking out for his daughter’s mental health. It’s about damned time.)
Chelsea: Upstairs, Jack is ignoring Jen’s emails (also, the nostalgia wave that hit like woah at ‘you’ve got mail’). Andie tells Jack that he can’t ignore Jen forever, and that he should keep his friends since she’s leaving to Italy. Jack tells her she’s just running away, that her leaving will break up their circle of friends since she’s the only one they’re all talking to. A pretty heavy load there, Jacky-boy, but given my feelings in the above paragraph, I can empathize. Then Jack gets all mopey about how there were certain people he could have sworn he knew, like really KNEW, but clearly doesn’t. Which is DEFINITELY more about Jen than it is about Andie. Stop projecting, bro.
Capeside High. Mitch and a cop pull Jen into his office, where her grandma and Drue’s mom are also standing. (what does Mitch do at this school, really? Coach football and… teach? Why does he get an office?) (K: I feel like they kept changing it up on a weekly basis? Sometimes he coached football. Sometimes he taught English. Other times, he was the guidance counsellor?? IDEK.) Why is Drue’s mom there? Because Drue is there and he’s confessed that he and Jen have been ‘bad kids’ recently and that it’s their fault Andie OD’d on the ecstasy. And it’s at this moment that I think: ‘I hate Drue more than I hate Dawson’ and this is a thing I’ve never thought before. So this moment was a bit of a game-changer for me.
K: I had basically the same reaction. Like, after recapping three and a half-ish seasons of this show, I didn’t think it was possible for me to hate a character more than I hate Dawson Leery (with the possible exception of Mitch). AND YET HERE COMES DRUE, STEALING THE CROWN.
Chelsea: Jen sits and attempts to defend herself, only to be shouted down by Drue’s mom blabbering on about how Drue had started to ‘turn his life around’ and Jen has pulled him back down into a life of sin and depravity, or something. Rage level: 4.
Drue then shines his imaginary halo even more by sanctimoniously filling the whole room in on he and Jen’s shoddy past, their former recreational drug use, and that he turning them in isn’t about punishment, it’s about prevention. He’s had a change of heart, and by coming forward he’s willing to change himself. Rage level: 7.
And then Jen looks at Grams with these huge eyes, imploring her, and Grams looks like she wants to believe it so badly. The officer in the office decides that the whole matter can be settled with 100 hours of community service, and Grams runs out of the office. When Jen chases after her, Grams gives her the “I’m not mad, I’m disappointed” conversation and leaves Jen crying on the sidewalk. Rage level: 10.
K: My notes suggested very strongly that Jen should punch Drue in the junk. I’m still sad she can’t hear me yelling at my television.
Chelsea: House of McPheelings. Jen rings the door and Jack answers, looking grumpy. Jen thanks him for the email that Jack says he didn’t send. (I think I see what’s happening here.) The two figure out that it was Andie’s doing just about as fast as I did, but Jack doesn’t want to forgive. Jen gives an intelligent and impassioned plea for forgiveness, that she’s only 17 and she’s apologized and at a certain point when your best friend asks you to look at them you just do. Then she walks out on Jack and BOOM. MAN, do I love Jen Lindley. Andie sneaks up behind Jack and he tells her that “nothing you can do is ever going to fix this.” I really adore it when fictional teenagers make predictions about the future state of their relationships (spoiler alert: it gets fixed).
Leery Manor. Joey is there with her application in hand. Dawson is getting paint things, which Joey helps him carry as Dawson teases her about how he’s the only one working off their debt to Mr. Brooks. He makes a joke about putting it on her tab that feels weirdly tense? I don’t know. This whole scene feels uncomfortable, probably because Dawson’s bangs are especially pointy on his forehead and I’m distracted. (K: The blonde spider clearly doesn’t enjoy the colder weather in Capeside.)
Joey gives him the recommendation form, and they go back and forth on whether or not he’s the right person, what about Pacey, blah blah blah I AM SO TIRED OF THIS ARBITRARY PLOT DEVICE. As if we didn’t have enough emotional “who will she pick” in every episode. NOW IT’S IN ACTUAL DIALOGUE. Joey then puts forth my least favorite line of this whole episode: “Are you the right person, Dawson? Well, you’re the only person who knows I have a ‘favor’ face.” Dawson agrees to write the letter, but I am throwing up in my mouth so hard right now.
K: FAVOUR FACE. WHAT THE FUCK IS FAVOUR FACE. NO. DON’T TELL ME. I DON’T WANT TO KNOW.
Chelsea: Not-Commercial Break.
Mr. Brooks’ house. Dawson is painting a fence (weird, I thought this painting was house-specific) and staring at the recommendation form. It’s lunch break time, though, and Mr. Brooks is feeding Dawson. All Dawson has to do is sit in silence and take berating from Mr. Brooks. When Dawson decides he doesn’t like these terms, and tries to go eat outside, Mr. Brooks tells him that’s why none of his friends come to help him paint – because he doesn’t face his issues and always just wants to ‘go outside’. And while I love Mr. Brooks’ churlishness and his apparently astute social observations, I still don’t want him giving life advice to Dawson. Whose friends don’t come to help him paint probably because he’s whiny and awful.
Mr. Brooks’ warns Dawson he’s going to do a lot more than just painting alone in the future, and Dawson snaps about where are all the people in Mr. Brooks’ life that love him? Mr. Brooks has a house of pictures of people, but no actual people. Mr. Brooks responds with a story about his brothers, a small business deal gone bad, and how sometimes you don’t choose to lose people from you life but making the wrong choices removes them anyway. It’s a really sad hint at how deep a character Mr. Brooks is, while also a moment for Dawson to feel shame. So, I love this scene.
House of McPheelings. Pacey drops off more homework for Andie. I wonder why she’s still doing homework if she’s got enough credits to graduate, but then I remember this is Andie we’re talking about. Andie tells Pacey about possibly (definitely) going to Italy and wonders if she’s actually just running away from her problems like Jack said. There’s some weird, canned feeling dialogue about how Andie has always saved herself, and now’s the chance for her to take the training wheels off her life. So, basically, this scene is about feeling comfortable in yourself and standing by your decisions. I’m cool with that.
K: Agreed. It also features Voice Of Reason Pacey, who’s one of my favourite Paceys.
Chelsea: Capeside High. Drue slides in next to Jen to share witty banter about what project in the community they should service for their 100 hours. But Jen isn’t feeling witty because Drue has had a pretty big hand in fucking up her life in a pretty major way up to this point. She tells him to be careful, that once Capeside makes up its mind about you no amount of atoning can change it. Drue says that Capeside will always be Jen’s past, that Capeside people aren’t her people, that he’s her people. Gross.
House of McPheelings. Tea is being poured as Jerky walks in the door. Andie, by this point, is clearly just trying to reassure herself that everyone will be fine in her absence, and says that she’s glad Jerky and Jack seemed to have worked things out. And if a homophobic father and his gay son can work through their issues, surely Jen and Jack and Pacey and Dawson can as well! Ah, dare to dream.
Dockside. Joey reads, Dawson approaches. He’s decided not to write her peer recommendation. He doesn’t think he’s the right person to write it anymore. Joey is surprised, probably because it resembles Dawson doing something selfless. Pacey walks up and the two do the bro-nod-say-each-other’s-name-greeting thing as Dawson walks off. Pacey asks if Dawson was there for a play date (there is innuendo here, yes? Most definitely yes) but she tells him that she asked Dawson to write a peer review but he said no so it’s really no big deal. Even though, given the backstory of the Dawson-Pacey-Joey triangle, it’s DEFINITELY a big deal, no matter how many times you say it’s not.
Pacey is understandably pissed that Joey didn’t tell him, because as he said it’s the ‘nothings’ that she tells him and the ‘somethings’ that she keeps secrets. When Joey says she’s not willing to engage in verbal sparring that day (oh, the teenspeak), Pacey is mad because now she’s dictating the terms of what they will or won’t discuss. She throws out a jibe about how she can’t tell him stuff if she can’t find him and he’s been at Andie’s house. Just when it looks like they’re heading into a really decent fight (so good), they veer instead to Joey reminiscing about Dawson (so bad). After all, she only asked him because Dawson does know her best, they’ve been friends forevvvvva, etc. Fair point, they have known each other since they were babies.
And just as I’m about to be on Team Joey, Pacey reminds me why the answer is ALWAYS Team Pacey by explaining to Joey that he’s not mad that she asked Dawson. He’s upset because he wants to be the person who knows her best, even though he doesn’t have that whole “best friends since childhood” time-stamp. STOP BREAKING MY HEART, WITTER. Joey looks properly shamed as we fade to black.
K: I had pretty much the same “Pacey, you’re being a dick OH NO FEELINGS” reaction to that scene. Dammit, Witter.
Chelsea: Leery’s Fresh Fish. Dawson and Joey both show up, looking swanky. Joey asks Dawson if he’s there to work, and he says he’s actually there to have dinner with Andie. Which, of course, is what Joey is also there for. And then Jack walks up – there’s a plot afoot here, my friends! The group heads inside the restaurant and finds Pacey sitting at the table already. And then Jen shows up and the whole group is together again! Jack threatens to leave, Jen threatens to leave instead, and then – SURPRISE! – Andie tells them that she’s the one leaving Capeside and before she goes she has something to tell them all. The sad strings play, and it’s all aboard the Monologue Monorail to Emotional Closure (K: A+). Which is like Disneyland only lame (side note: this does not happen; teens do not sit quietly in a circle while one of their friends delivers a tearful lecture monologue).
Andie says her goodbyes to the show her friends, touching on:
a.) stopping the blame-game on Jen when Andie was the one who actually took the ecstasy
b.) Joey, Pacey, and Dawson getting the fuck over themselves and realizing how rare life-long friendships actually are
c.) Jack and Jen basically being sisters-from-other-misters and how she doesn’t worry about Jack losing a sister as long as he has Jen
I would keep going, guys, but even my broken cynical heart is tearing up too enormously to see this computer screen. To be honest, saying goodbye to the people you knew and loved in high school can be incredibly difficult, even if it is within the context of being a supergenius who gets to leave high school early to cavort off to Italy.
K: I had a lot of feelings and slightly teary moments over this scene. Then I realised how monumentally awkward this must be for literally everyone else in the restaurant, and I got a dose of second hand embarrassment for fictional characters.
Chelsea: After Andie’s rousing Rudy-esque team-building speech, Joey and Pacey run into each other outside the bathroom and Pacey apologizes for flying off the handle and “acting like Pacey”; Joey tells him it’ll only take ten years until he’s the one who knows her best. (Second favorite worst line of the night: “Dawson knows my past. My future lies with you.” barf.)
And just when I’d thought my heart strings were home free, they start playing Sarah McLachlan’s “I Will Remember You” and everything inside me fucking explodes. Seriously, you guys. I can’t with this song in this moment. It’s both so sad I’m tearing up again and so cheesy, I’m surprise you can still read this over the sound of my scoffing.
K: I really wish they’d stop playing Sarah McLachlan at emotional moments during this fucking show because it reminds me of the finale and then I’m just a hot mess of ugly crying forever and ever.
Chelsea: Over Sarah’s dulcet tones, Jack and Jen are also making amends. Jack apologizes for blaming her so hard, saying he was just “afraid she was changing on him,” which makes me cringe with all kinds of self-deterministic bullshit (so Jen can’t change and still have you as a friend?! What are you trying to say here McPhee?! HUH?!) and Jen’s like ‘nope, was just here being honest with you the whole time mmkay thanks’. Jack apologizes, Jen says she doesn’t need an apology, she needs someone to stand by her. Jack asks her if she’s still standing and they giggle and hug and the world is back on its proper axis, thankyoujesus.
Then it’s time for Joey and Dawson to settle up. He makes some claim about how he didn’t write her peer recommendation because “he was scared about what would happen if he put it all down on paper,” which I’m guessing means he either would have a.) punched Pacey again or b.) tried to kiss Joey again, neither of which are good options. He asks if she’s still willing to let him write it. She accepts the offer and they walk back into Leery’s Fresh Fish.
And, lastly, in the final heart-shredding encounter of this episode, Andie walks up on Pacey and says this might be the last time they see each other. He brushes away the thought with Pacey-like nonchalance. Andie thanks him for his strength, and he thanks her for showing him that he’s not a total loser like his family always said he was. They hug and I just remembered that scene where Andie is on ecstasy and tells Pacey how much she still loves him and I JUST CANNOT WITH THE PACEY-RELATED FEELS. Andie tells Jack goodbye (which, like, weird because won’t he be there at the airport?) and then the group gets together for one last photo of everyone.
We end on a black-and-white group shot while the last line of Sarah’s song sings like a blonde white-lady emotion ghost: “weep not for the memories.” Easy for you to say, Sarah. Easy for you to say.
K: Seriously. I have so many emotions over that damned photo. Especially the part where Andie does some sneaky manouevering at the last minute to make sure Pacey and Dawson are standing together.
Chelsea: Wow, guys. That was a bit of a tough one. Contrived nostalgia about how sad/scary it was to say goodbye to everyone in high school gets me right in the feels, every time.
PS: I didn’t realize this show was filmed in memorial to the actor behind Jerky McPhee. Real-life sad.
K: Agreed over the real-life sad. This episode was definitely rough, in both senses of the word. It basically shows us the best and worst things about Dawson’s Creek: best? Pacey Witter. Andie and Pacey’s friendship. Jack and Jen’s friendship. Mr. Brooks’ hatred of Dawson. Emotional reactions. Worst? Cheesy dialogue. Drue. Being hit over the head with nonsensical plot devices.
Next time on Dawson’s Creek: A time when senior pranks were still a thing on S04 E08 – The Unusual Suspects.
A collector of coffee cups, a lover of books with broken binding, and the one true Ben/Leslie shipper. Feel free to check out all my bookish and pop culture nerdgasms over at www.youtube.com/TheReadingOutlaw!
I'm a 30-something librarian and I still live with my parents because I'm super broke. Leader of Team Heartless Cow. I have an inexplicable love for 90s television, eat too much chocolate, and read more than is good for me.
I'm a J.D. by day/blogger by night who directs her snark and judgment primarily towards celebrities and their many red carpet mishaps. Blogging from the style capital of the world (just kidding - I live in DC), I rant and rave over the best and worst in fashion and pop culture.
