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sense this doesn’t any make

Breaking Dawn Chapter 15 – Building up to baby love

by Catherine March 13, 2017 Books
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The title of this chapter is ‘Tick Tock Tick Tock Tick Tock’, which is appropriate because I can feel my life slipping away as I read it. (K: Samesies.) (A: Ditto.)

We begin with Jacob thinking more about Leah and how much he hates her. This time it’s because, although Leah is ‘trying hard’ to think less aggressive thoughts, (I guess?) she still doesn’t like the vampires and she doesn’t like Jake and Seth’s friendship with them. Jake realizes, though that Leah has been less of a bitch to him and wonders if it’s because he understands her hostility better now.

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Charmed S03 E06 – Empathetic

by Marines February 8, 2017 Charmed
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Prue is in the kitchen trying to telekinesis a fork off the counter. We hear the tinkle that usually follows her powers, but the fork won’t move. Phoebe walks in having some kind of a fashion meltdown, but since her Pocahontas-inspired handkerchief top is no worse than 99% of what she’s always wearing, IDK what the emergency is. When Phoebe realizes that Prue can’t move the fork, she worriedly asks if Prue’s lost her powers. Prue says you can’t lose what you never had and disappears.

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After Chapter 22 – Creepy response

by Marines January 24, 2017 After
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Hokay so, Tessa is getting ready to go to her first class of the day. I read the last chapter and I still have no idea time wise how we got here but it’s a new day so I am not poking it. Landon is waiting for her and they start heading to class, you know, the one that Hardin is also in. Landon asks after Tessa’s weekend and she says it was terrible. She asks him how his GF, Dakota, is and he becomes really happy and starts talking about her.

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Breaking Dawn Chapter 11 – Everyone gets a baby.

by Catherine January 23, 2017 Books
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Already going into this chapter, I can see a lot of wolf thoughts in italics and I hate this narrative device so much for some reason. (K: SAAAAAME.) You may remember that the last chapter ended with Jacob refusing a direct order from Sam, the Alpha wolf, and then crumpling on the ground. I believe those of us in the Pick Up Artist community refer to that as a ‘beta cuck’.

This is supposed to be this big build up from New Moon for us to finally see what happens when a wolf actually refuses the command of their Alpha but I don’t care about… any of this so.

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Designated Survivor S01 E08 – Barely not vomitting.

by Dani Denatti January 18, 2017 Designated Survivor
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I take full responsibility for getting us behind on this show. Between the December blues and life, this fell to the bottom of my list. The good news is that there are no new episodes until March so we have time to play catch up! Also, the still of this episode on the ABC app is Leo looking as whiny as Conor from Angel.

Dani: That alone would have derailed my motivation.

Marines: I already watched this episode but that description makes me wish I could unwatch it.

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Doctor Who S04 E15 – Stingraliens

by Kirsti January 4, 2017 Doctor Who
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International¬†Gallery. Four armed guards take their positions around a force field meant to protect a big ass golden goblet. I’m going to show you how they are protecting this and you tell me if you see any lapses in security:

Kirsti: As a former museum curator, THIS IS THE WORST SECURITY OF ALL TIME. Why the eff would you spend that much on laser systems and paying security guards and, you know, NOT PUT THE FREAKING OBJECT IN A SHOWCASE WITH BUILT IN ALARMS AND BULLET PROOF GLASS?!?!?!?! Sense: this doesn’t any make.

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Charmed S03 E04 – Single-shaming.

by Marines December 7, 2016 Charmed
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Manor. It’s Halloween. Piper is Glinda the Good Witch, Prue is something that involves glitter, and Phoebe is Elvira. Piper says she’s got a new attitude and she’s determined to celebrate the witches’ holiday with enthusiasm. Phoebe objects to the portrayal of witches in popular culture and… I can’t. Too on the nose.

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Designated Survivor S01 E05 -The Snark Lady soundtrack.

by Samantha November 4, 2016 Designated Survivor
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The episode begins with Tom lying awake in bed at 5 am. He receives a phone call that it’s time.

In the Oval, the Admiral is going over plans to bomb the compound where Nassar is. He assures Tom that they only hit what they target so a nearby village should be safe. Seth comes in because he was summoned, but only so that they don’t tell him anything so that he’s not lying to the press. Seth mentions that it would be weird if the President wasn’t at the medal ceremony for the first responders, especially as there’s no VP to fill in.

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After Chapter 08 – Flat faced kissing.

by Samantha October 25, 2016 After
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After Tessa catches Hardin and the pink haired girl macking in sin, she… stands there. She truly just stands there because she can’t get her feet to move. Cool.

Marines: Tessa is so stunned by two young people making out that she literally can’t get her body to move? Honestly? You were just trying to kiss your boyfriend like 3 micro-chapters ago.¬†

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Supergirl S02 E01 – We’re on the CW now.

by Samantha October 19, 2016 Season 1
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Hello and welcome to the second season! We really appreciate those of you that have stuck with us this far!

Marines:¬†I like this grand announcement as if we didn’t finish season one last week. But, like, yeah. Welcome back!

Catherine: How are you guys? It’s been SO long…

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After Chapter 06 – Purple eyeliner hussies.

by Marines October 18, 2016 After
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We pick up this chapter approximately 15 minutes later. Tessa has curled her hair! Oh my god! I really wasn’t sure what she was going to do after that curling iron cliffhanger!

Steph offers Tessa her makeup, like a nice person. Tessa tells us that she’s a member of the Big Eyes club.

She asks for some eyeliner and Steph gives her brown, black, and purple. Steph also suggests that the purple would look pretty with Tessa’s Big Eyes but Tessa isn’t a slut or something so she can’t use purple. She puts on a little bit of black and Steph is proud. This has all been a literal 1/4 of this chapter.

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Eclipse Chapter 26 – A fucking monster.

by Annie September 22, 2016 Books
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The chapter opens with Bella telling us that the vampires are all so perfect they couldn’t possibly ever need or use beauty products so Alice must have filled the bathroom with stuff so Bella can cover up her ugly human face. Great.

Alice brushes Bella’s hair (K: Because a child needs both a father AND a mother. Edward can’t do it all, you guys) and Bella whines that she wants to go to La Push because she wants to go and sit by Jacob’s bedside but Alice tells her she needs to go home so Charlie won’t get suspicious. This back and forth goes on for a page and a half. Bella worries about Jacob while Alice insists she goes home to protect the alibi.

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Charmed S03 E02 – OWL always love you.

by Marines August 6, 2016 Charmed
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Piper is waiting in a salon, watching two women under hair dryers flip through bridal magazines. She looks down at the table where there is a pile of magazines there too. She picks one up, frustratedly puts it down, and decides to walk out on her hair appointment? Like, did she change her mind about her dirty hair? Was she just sitting there to spy on women reading bridal magazines? I don’t really know.

Piper gets into a elevator and two women walk in and excitedly show off their engagement rings.

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Eclipse Chapter 11 – Racially Uncomfortable

by Catherine July 25, 2016 Books
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So after Bella was handed off for partial custody from vampire to werewolf last chapter, she starts this chapter at a bonfire with all of the werewolves.

They’re eating hotdogs and talking.

Kirsti: More accurately, they’re eating hot dogs that were cooked on wire hangers. I’m still not sure why that level of detail was necessary.

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