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Designated Survivor S01 E12 – Tighten your circle.

by Samantha June 5, 2017 Designated Survivor
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The previouslies remind us that Tom was shot, MacLeish was President for a bit and made some sketchy decisions, and oh yeah, ATWOOD’S SON IS I GUESS STILL KIDNAPPED? Can I tangent about this for a bit? Why has no one reported this child missing? Why has no one else noticed that this child is missing and put two and two together? What the hell?

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BrainDead S01 E12 – Another Fine Mess

by Dani December 2, 2016 BrainDead
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Our singing recapper (aka THE BEST THING EVER) (M: I’m gonna miss it so much) tells us what happened last week:

We begin with Luke telling Laurel about the bug briefing he got from Bob Isenstadt, the grandfatherly “Director’s Director” of the CIA. Laurel is rightfully suspicious, but Luke thinks she should be happy because this means she was right all along, and now the professionals will handle the crisis. He tells her she has to back off and let the CIA do their job.

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BrainDead S01 E09 – Friends, Not Food

by Dani October 7, 2016 BrainDead
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Our singing recapper (the fabulous Jonathan Coulton) gets a small cameo in this week’s “previously on” bit. But then he gets infected by space bugs, and his head explodes, so I guess the exposure won’t exactly boost his career now.

We begin with Rochelle and Laurel staring at the mysterious SRB-54 door that the guy who attacked Rochelle went through after they released him in the last episode. Laurel prepares a fake package and tries to scope out the room when she delivers it. She spots Dr. Samira, the guy who testified that Syria was behind the exploding heads (even though they weren’t), but then the rude guy who opened the door (Jacob Pitts, Justified) slams it in her face.

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Supergirl S01 E17 – That’s not how any of this works.

by Marines October 3, 2016 Season 1
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Kara is wearing flannel over her Supergirl costume and eating a donut on the couch so that her brooding is super telegraphed. She’s watching coverage of a bank robbery she tried to stop, but people are still pretty wary of her after she murdered alcohol bottles with peanuts, or whatever. (S: And wore extra cute clothes!) (C: Boo the lady with the fashion sense.) 

At Cat Co, Cat is having a bad day because “Sandy Bullock” stole her exercise machine and also because National City is being slow to forgive Supergirl and the crime rate is up.

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Eclipse Chapter 25 – A Sam of wolves

by Marines September 19, 2016 Books
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The fact that we are still recapping this is no longer a joke. (K: This is the book that doesn’t eeeeeeend, it just goes on and on my friiiiiend.)

I briefly forgot where we even are in the story, but it all came rushing back when Bella describes Victoria’s headless corpse, which Edward then dismembers. Bella laments that she can’t go over to her boyfriend and, I don’t know pet him? comfort him? cheer him on? as he dismembers a body. She does watch all of this closely, though, in case somehow dismembering a corpse hurts him.

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BrainDead S01 E07 – Pure Torture

by Dani September 14, 2016 BrainDead
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For this episode’s “Previously on BrainDead” song, Jonathan Coulton pretends he wasn’t just as worried as the rest of us when the space bugs got to Laurel.

Once again, we begin where the last episode ended — with Laurel and Gareth at the bar, trying to make things normal again, and Laurel saying she thinks bugs are eating people’s brains and making them stupid. Because that’s a totally normal thing to say.

Gareth is thrown by this, and Laurel admits she is, too. He asks about the bugs but struggles to take any of it seriously.

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Game of Thrones S06 E10 – I’m watching it burn.

by Catherine September 8, 2016 Game of Thrones
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It’s only been six weeks (at the time of writing this) between recaps, you guys. That’s like a hot second to Melisandre. And don’t pretend you didn’t need some time to digest this madness before digging in. Now that I’ve made myself feel less guilty for delaying this so long, let’s do this fucking finale.

Catherine: Ha! Smart. But honestly, we have so long until the next season starts that us delaying this long just means that you guys won’t have to wait that extra six weeks for season 7 posts to start? Maybe? 

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BrainDead S01 E04 – Liberal Tourette’s

by Dani August 23, 2016 BrainDead
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We begin with the best previously song yet:

“Have you no sense of decency? My God, you monsters… not the cat!”

Marines: This song is basically doing our job for us.

Dani: (Shhhh…)

The action starts in an apartment building where a woman named Jules (Natalie Gold) meets her next-door neighbor, Noah (Michael Esper), for the first time.

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BrainDead S01 E03 – It’s Not Poetry

by Dani August 15, 2016 BrainDead
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Once again, we begin with a recap song by Jonathan Coulton:

After the previouslies, we open on Senator Ella Pollack (Luke’s new rival for party Whip), who’s home with a cold. She gets a conciliatory arrangement of cherry blossoms from Luke, although it was actually Scarlett who sent them. Luke and Ella decide they’d rather work together than against each other, and they agree to talk soon. Luke tells Scarlett she’s a genius, and I throw up a little in my mouth.

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BrainDead S01 E01 – #TeamMagicallyDelicious

by Dani August 8, 2016 BrainDead
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The show begins with a collection of TV screens displaying clips from our current election cycle. Scrawled across them, we get the following message:

“In the year 2016 there was a growing sense that people were losing their minds… And no one knew why…Until now.”


Marines: Well, shit. That’s scary because I do think people are losing their minds, but I’m not sure how I feel about zombie bugs as a reason…

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Pretty Little Liars S05 E12 – Thanksgiving murder

by Marines July 14, 2016 Pretty Little Liars
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It’s Thanksgiving Day and Aria, Hanna and Emily are sadly standing outside of a house. There are police cars everywhere and some police tape is blocking off the entrance to the house. Ezra is there too, but I try to ignore him as much as possible.

Jessica: A good piece of advice for all of us.

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Game of Thrones S06 E09 – It’s basically Woodstock.

by DemocracyDiva July 13, 2016 Game of Thrones
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Ladies and gentlemen, you could’ve been anywhere in the world tonight, but you’re here with us in Winterfell. Are you ready for a BastardBowl?

Catherine: Get hype! We’re probably gonna be in tears before this is over. 

Diva: We’re probably gonna be in tears before this starts.

The previouslies remind us that the battle for Winterfell is imminent, Shireen Baratheon loved the toy stag that Davos gave her (see – I’m already crying!), the Greyjoys are en route to Meereen, and the slavers are trying to blow up Dany’s pyramid just as she deboards her dragon.

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Supernatural S05 E22 – I’m your density!

by Kirsti July 6, 2016 Season 5
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CARRY ON MY WAYWARD SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!!! (S: THERE’LL BE PEACE WHEN YOU ARE DOOONE.)

That’s right, friends. It’s the final episode of the season, and that means it’s time for the previouslies to take us right back to the beginning and remind us of all the major plot points from the past five seasons that may prove relevant here. But mostly it means a full minute of jamming to Kansas because I have not so secretly terrible taste in music.

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Supernatural S05 E20 – Who the eff is this?

by Kirsti June 1, 2016 Season 5
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The previouslies take us right back to Jessica, followed by a reminder about the Croatoan virus and Crowley, so clearly we’re in for a good time.

We open in a medical research lab, full of lab rats and lab monkeys. A janitor mops the floor as two medical researchers in lab coats talk about how it seems crazy to jump straight to human testing when neither of them have seen the vaccine yet. They study the monkeys and jot down notes as they talk. One looks like a short version of Barack Obama, and it’s very disconcerting. The janitor turns towards them and says that he’s seen the vaccine. They’re all “The fuck?”, and he grins that he’s running an experiment of his own.

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Game of Thrones S06 E05 – RIP Everyone

by DemocracyDiva May 30, 2016 Game of Thrones
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There is only one way to describe how I feel sitting down to rewatch and recap this episode.

Marines: A+. 1430.

Diva: Let’s do this before I lose my nerve and melt into a puddle of feels.

After some uneventful previouslies/credits, Sansa is sewing and someone delivers her a letter. It has the mockingbird seal on it, so you know it’s from Katniss Littlefinger. She reads the letter and asks how far they are from Mole’s Town, the village near Castle Black renowned for its whorehouses.

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