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Supergirl S02 E05 – Gun control

by Catherine April 24, 2017 Season 2
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Hey, so it’s been a while! I don’t really know why. I do know that I always see people squeeing about this show on Twitter, and I’m not sure if it’s because it’s gotten better in season two or if we are seriously not watching the same show.

Catherine: SAME. I have friends who watch this and tell me it’s amazing. I’m so bored. What are we missing? 

Samantha: Maybe it’s one of those shows that just really really falls apart upon recapping but works if you just mindlessly enjoy it?

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Gilmore Girls S01 E01 – Emotional music and boy banter.

by Marines November 28, 2016 Gilmore Girls
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This past weekend the Gilmore Girls revival premiered on Netflix. Why not choose this moment to start our journey from the very beginning?

A title card and jaunty yet dated music bring us to a street in the quaint town of Stars Hollow.

Annie: I know it’s early for me to be already interrupting, but Pilot!Stars Hollow was filmed in a small town near Toronto. I visited it last year and all these years later, it really, really looks like Stars Hollow to me. (Sorry, sorry, sorry).

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New Moon Chapter 01 – Paper – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – Cut

by Marines March 1, 2016 Books
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And we’re back! I added a little exclamation point to feign some excitement about reading this again. I am happy you are here, though. Welcome! (Note: Genuine exclamation point that time.)

Say hello, ladies:

Kirsti: HELLO FRIENDS. Fun fact: when I first typed that, I wrote “HELL FRIENDS”, and that accurately depicts what reading and recapping this book is like: you’re in hell, but at least you have friends to complain to about how godawful it is.

Catherine: Hi! I’m glad to see you all again although I wish it was under better circumstances. We really must meet at a happier occasion sometime. Like a funeral or a Mary Kay party.

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Supernatural S05 E09 – The facial expressions win the episode.

by Samantha February 20, 2016 Season 5
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The boys are burning rubber in the Impala as dramatic music plays. They pull up to a hotel and hurry out of the car when Dean double takes because there are several other ’67 Chevy Impala’s in the parking lot, exactly like Baby. Sam tells him to hurry up and we see Chuck pacing outside of the hotel. They hurry over to him and he seems super confused as to why they’re there. Sam is all “You sent me a text, bro and said it was life or death.” Chuck denies this and Dean is pissed because they drove all night. Realization seems to hit Chuck’s face and he oh nos. We hear Becky’s OMG voice say, “Sam!” and squealing. She runs up and Sam remembers her name which causes her to almost orgasm. Dean eye rolls hard and Becky says that Sam seems to have been thinking about her.

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Jessica Jones S01 E02 – Awkward ’cause of sex.

by Samantha January 4, 2016 Jessica Jones
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I love this shooooooooooow. Okay. We open with the Marvel logo and the pretty and disarming credits. I love how the music starts kind of low key and quaint and then builds into this more rock thing.

Credits over, Jessica Jones is sitting in a police interrogation room. A detective comes in and she tells him that she’s not sure how much more she can tell him. He comments on her tension and she’s basically like “Yeah. I watched people get murdered by an abused and controlled girl at the end of last episode. Of course I am.” He asks how she got in touch with the Shlottman’s and how she found Hope.

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Supernatural S04 E22 – Just drink.

by Marines November 4, 2015 Season 4
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LOOK AT ME! I’m recapping an episode of Supernatural!

…which probably explains why this is all late because I’m messing up Kirsti’s timeliness completely. Sorry I’m the worst!

Kirsti: Who cares about timeliness when it means I GET AN EPISODE OFF WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

Mari: Oh, okay. I feel better!

Carry on my wayward son! I’ve been around these parts long enough to know that this song means we’ve reached finale time. There is a round of extended, season-long previouslies that ends with Sam walking out on Dean.

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Charmed S02 E18 – Character Crushes

by Marines October 2, 2015 Charmed
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At the manor, Prue is taking “artistic” photos of Piper, who’s moping by the window and watching Dan come home alone like one of those sad, loser single people. Prue tells her to cheer up because Leo is in town for dinner and a movie. Oh boy, I can’t wait. It’s her first real date with Leo as a normal couple, although I’m not entirely sure why since she’s still a witch and he’s a Whitelighter again, but sure, whatever.

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Gotham S01 E17 – New character danger

by Marines March 19, 2015 Gotham
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A crime van pulls up along a curb. A bunch of people get off, including one dude who was stuffed in the itty bitty trunk, even though there are at least three rows of seats in the van proper. Your friends suck, mate.

The five criminals walk in a line and Trunk Dude whips out his RED HOOD. The boss man asks him WTF is up with the hood and the Sucky Mates wonder if they should’ve gotten hoods too. Boss Man look a little put-off but not enough to stop the heist. They bust into the bank and Red Hood pushes to the front and starts with the dramatics, yelling at everyone that they just want the money and hopping up on the teller desk.

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Supernatural S03 E07 – Crossover Vampires

by Kirsti March 11, 2015 Season 3
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Night. A fancy Mercedes is parked by a deserted looking bridge. Bela returns to her car with a briefcase that’s presumably full of money and gasps when she sees someone reflected in the window behind her. It’s Gordon, though she doesn’t know that. He introduces himself and she looks momentarily freaked. She says that she’s heard of him, and thought he was in prison.

Anna May: MORE BELA YAY. Also it’s been so long since I watched Supernatural in a non-snark capacity and I’m rapidly realising that I’m not far off a Snow here– I’ve completely forgotten who Gordon is. Guess I’m going to find out.

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Charmed S02 E07 – Nothing makes sense

by Marines January 17, 2015 Charmed
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We open at a museum with a tour guide describing a legendary book known as the Akashic records, thought to contain an account of all of time’s significant events. Everyone from Hitler, to probably, most likely warlocks has been looking for it. The guide leads his group to a tablet of dead language engravings and explains that anyone who can decipher it will learn the location of the records. As the tour guide speaks, a shifty eyed guy watches another guy who’s examining the tablet and taking notes. Note Guy announces that he’s figured it out and runs off leaving Shifty to look even shiftier. Maybe don’t talk out loud about your deciphering skills near a tablet that no one can decipher?

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Charmed S02 E04 – These things cannot be unseen.

by Marines December 20, 2014 Charmed
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We open with a very lame night at P^3. People are leaving because this show is so awful the club is dead.

Prue tells Phoebe that she thinks they are going to have to take up that offer. Phoebe responds, “please tell me about that offer even though we’ve presumably already talked about it off screen!” Apparently, some guy named Chris Barker has offered them a no-interest loan they can pay back anytime. Prue says they aren’t going to tell Piper about it, though, because.

Stephanie: They’re at The Bronze, where you have an 85% chance of dying, but it’s still preferable to this. 

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Supernatural S02 E13 – Avenging Angels

by Kirsti October 15, 2014 Season 2
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First things first, this is the second of three episodes in this season that’s named after a Led Zeppelin song. I know Dean loves his Zeppelin, but that’s a little over the top. ANYWAY. Providence, Rhode Island. A junkie-looking young woman sits watching TV, surrounded by creepy-as-shit angel statues. She flicks from the Drew Carey Show to a televangelist, wibbling about how God is with you. She turns the TV off, and the lights flicker. The TV switches on again. The televangelist asks if she can hear the glory. The lights continue to flicker and the room starts to shake. She stares in shock and awe at a white light that appears.

FLAME ON!

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Supernatural S02 E12 – Cybermen would be preferable

by Kirsti October 11, 2014 Season 2
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We open with a news bulletin in Milwaukee about a siege going on at a bank downtown. A reporter informs us there are about ten hostages, then there’s a kerfuffle in the background. The zoomy cameraman earns his pay cheque and shows us that Dean’s in the doorway of the bank, using a security guard as a human shield. He yells at the cops to get back, then gets “OH SHIT” face when he sees the news cameras.

FLAME ON!

After the credits, it’s the previous day and the boys are at a jewellery store pretending to be FBI agents.

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Veronica Mars S02 E15 – Be our friend, Heidi!

by DemocracyDiva October 7, 2014 Season 2
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We begin with the Marses discussing the big reveal at the end of the previous episode – that Terrence Cook has a butt-load of explosives in his fancy car/helicopter hangar. Veronica half-heartedly tries to pretend Terrence just had a hobby that involved blowing shit up, but that’s pretty unlikely.

Sweeney: So are the multitude of paternity mysteries in this town of plot-shifting size, though! You keep those fingers crossed for Terrence, girl. Also for Keith. Mostly for Keith.

Diva: Excellent point. I don’t know why I suddenly expected “unlikeliness” to matter at all in this town.

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Game of Thrones S04 E10 – Happy Father’s Day!

by Sweeney June 23, 2014 Game of Thrones
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Final magical/lying credits of the season take us through King’s Landing, Moat Cailin, WinterfellFOREVERonfire, The Wall, across The Narrow Sea to a scary game of Mouse Trap Braavos, and finally Meereen.

We resume where we last left Jon Snow, heading north of the wall, swordless, to kill Mance. There’s a lot of weird shaky cam which made me think direwolf cam but no, it’s just Wildling cam. Jon surrenders immediately, explaining to Mance that he’s been sent to negotiate with him.

Lorraine: I thought Jon’s plan involved some amount of being sneaky. It makes sense that he left his sword, now, since his entire plan was just walking right up to the people who were trying to kill him.

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