The Coldest Girl in Coldtown by Holly Black
Release Date: September 3, 2013
Source: Purchased
Order: Powell’s || Amazon
In a nutshell: This is a YA book about vampires. I just wanted to say that right away. In Holly Black’s newest, everyone knows vampires exist. In fact, places called Coldtowns exist, walled cities where the fanged creatures can mingle, party, feed off of and (mostly) co-exist with humans. There are those who got stuck in Coldtowns when the walls went up and there are those who chose to go there willingly. The catch is that once you enter a Coldtown, you can never get out.
At the beginning of the book, Tana wakes up after a party to find a house full of corpses. She survived, her ex-boyfriend survived and so did a darkly handsome and entirely strange vampire who looks like he needs Tana’s help. Tana has to get them out of the house before trouble finds them again. Faced with few options, and the possibility that she’s infected, Tana decides she has to travel to the Coldtown that started it all.
We Judge Covers: The pale hand on a vampire book has been done before, and it really makes me wonder about that choice. I mean, I guess not really. If you want to attract that audience, I suppose that’s one way to go. Because I happen to hate the Twilight series on principle (and because all of the shit it bred) I give the cover negative marks. The font is fine. There. A compliment.
Main Character: Tana is the type of MC that you spend time with, but don’t really know much about, all said and done. This book is more about (sort of) (we’ll get there) action, and doesn’t focus on an intricate study. And that’s fine! I’m just saying that finding things to say about Tana isn’t easy. She’s got a bit of a sarcastic bite, in addition to a brand of bravery I can appreciate. She pushes herself to make the hard decisions, to take one more step and try one more thing. She’s freaking out on the inside, which makes it easier to accept when she’s facing off with (and often besting) all these super powerful and old vamps.
Love Interest: Gavriel was… interesting. He’s got the dark haired, pale vampire thing going for him, and in this world, vampires have fully red eyes. IDK if I could stare longingly into red eyes, but I’ve never tried it so who knows. The book spends some time going, “GAVRIEL IS CRAZY AS SHIT… but dreamy.” Not in so many words, but I’m here to recap things for you. I’m not sure I ever picked up on the dreamy bit, but I’m a hard sell when it comes to love interests, especially when it comes down to a guy who has to try really hard not to be murderously insane. Towards the end, the relationship between Tana and Gavriel falls into the insta-love trap. Gavriel, dude, you’ve been alive forever. You have nothing but time.
Negligent Parents? Funny story about Tana’s mother, who tricked baby Tana in a pretty wicked way. It wasn’t negligent per se, and is something you should probably read in the book itself. Tana’s dad doesn’t get a ton of screen time, but is able to write Tana off pretty quickly when there’s a chance she might be infected. I’m not sure if I can call that negligent when the outcome is vampiarism. Because self-preservation, yo.
1430: The opening scene is pretty great. It sets an amazing tone and pace and does a good job feeding information about this world we’ve entered. It wasn’t a pace Black was able to consistently keep up with, but at least she wrote an opening scene good enough to sucker people into reading more.
I really do like the idea of Coldtowns, though, and the reality TV spin that Black incorporates. I find it strangely believable that people would be addicted to the live feeds coming out of the Coldtowns, drawn to the macabre and using them as a means of escaping a terrifying reality. There were some issues with the book overall, but surprisingly the vampires weren’t a big part of that. I’m not a huge fan of vampire lore, so I have no opinions on the details there, but I liked that they were more gore-y and less sparkly.
#MEH: The writing was a bit cheesy at points. She started every chapter with a random quote on death, that really felt like she just searched Google for “quotes about death.” Also, there were phrases that Black just (I’m about to pun) sucked dry. I can’t tell you how many times Tana was holding back a hysterical giggle. By the 80% mark I was yelling at her to just freakin’ laugh already. Between Aiden and Gavriel, there was a lot of sexual smiling and one corner of the mouth turning up. The book also included a few flashback chapters that often felt like info dumps.
The End: It’s probably pretty bad that I read this last week and I’m having a hard time remembering how it ended. I remember the beginning though! Crap. I should’ve taken notes.
Away Message Worthy Quote: “Death’s favorites don’t die.” I’m not entirely sure what that means, BUT it totally seems worthy of an Away Message. And there were slim pickings.
For Traumateers who love: vampires stories so much, they have to check this out just to see.
Final Grade: C
I'm a 30-something south Floridan who loves the beach but cannot swim. Such is my life, full of small contradictions and little trivialities. My main life goals are never to take life too seriously, but to do everything I attempt seriously well. After that, my life goals devolve into things like not wearing pants and eating all of the Zebra Cakes in the world. THE WORLD.
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