Previously: Tamara came back to town, Dawson and Joey squabbled about art, and Andie admitted she likes Pacey. Aww.
—
Full Moon Rising
Kirsti: Shrine o’ Spielberg. A werewolf movie plays on Dawson’s TV as he talks about how romantic the full moon is. The camera pans up to show us that Dawson and Joey aren’t on the bed, they’re outside on the roof staring at the moon. Dawson wibbles some more about how romantic and peaceful it is, while Joey makes WTF faces and says that it’s just “a natural satellite“. Way to be a buzzkill, Potter. She starts talking about the full moon making people crazy and how she thinks it’s because we’re 70% water and the moon effects us as well as the tides. Dawson, meanwhile, is trying to swallow her head.
NOM.
She says again that weird shit happens during the full moon, and Dawson slips down the roof. She thinks he’s joking around, but his face says “Shit, she’s right about the full moon.”
Democracy Diva: We’re clearly supposed to be taking this full moon very seriously, because it will destroy their relationship!!! Except, 1) This is stupid. b) I hope it’s true because please let this relationship die already. cat) If no one turns into a werewolf by the end of this episode, I’m gonna be pissed.
K: Agreed on all three counts.
I DON’T WANNA WAIT.
After the credits, we’re (LOL) downtown. Mitch and Tamara are discussing her property some more. He wants to see the plans again before he makes a decision. She says she’s desperate to sell and burn all her bridges with Capeside. Just down the block, Abercrombie Fisherman runs up to Jen and asks where Abby is. Jen says they’re having “a trial separation period.” He flirts with her, and I throw up in my mouth repeatedly. He says that he’s been at sea for 18 days and would love to have a conversation that features coffee and a lack of four letter words. She agrees to meet him at 7.30 that night. GIRL, NO. I just checked IMDB and this dude was 31 when they filmed this episode. As a 31 year old, STEP AWAY FROM THE SIXTEEN YEAR OLD GIRL YOU FUCKING CREEPER WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU DO YOU WANT TO GO TO JAIL?!?!?!?!
Diva: RAGEW.
K: Ahem.
Andie heads into the video store and Pacey hurridly turns off the porn he was watching – Jacuzzi Floozies. He declares that the most interesting part of porn movies is the title. They spar back and forth a little and he says they should just bite the bullet and go out. She says she’ll only go if he asks politely. To her surprise, he does. She gives a nonchalant “Okay,” in response. Pacey says they should go to the movies and that he’ll pick her up at 7.30. Andie gets twitchy and says she’ll meet him there. He insists that he can pick her up because it’s a date and all, and she decides that maybe they shouldn’t do this after all. I get distracted by the cardboard cutout watching them in the background:
“Lemme call you right back, Joe, a goofy kid is asking out an awkward girl and I wanna see how it ends.”
Diva: Totally did not notice this, but now I can’t look at anything else.
K: This is why I’m here – to point out the mundane shit that no one else notices.
Andie awkwards some more, then agrees that he can pick her up. She rushes out, and Pacey looks confused for a second or two before he grins. Outside, Andie does the same.
At a Sephora Wannabe, Jen applies lip gloss straight from the sampler. GIRL, NO. That’s disgusting. Abby rushes in, wondering if Jen’s still mad. When Jen’s all “Um, DUH?” Abby blames hormones for what she said, then shoplifts. She says that they should never let a guy come between them again, because they’re rebellious soulmates or some shit. Jen smiles and confides in Abby that she has a pedo-date with Abercrombie Fisherman. “You bitch!” Abby replies, accusing Jen of stealing him from her. Jen rushes out of the shop and Abby follows, telling her to buy condoms for the kinky sex Abercrombie will no doubt insist on having. But it’s okay, Abby says, because Jen’s from New York so she’s used to that. Jen yells at her to back off, but Abby calls her “an easy lay.” Jen spins around and slaps her IN THE FACE.
Sadly, I couldn’t find a gif of it. But here’s the aftermath.
Diva: BOOM. Kids, violence is bad, but that bitchslap was AWESOME.
K: Truth.
Jen storms off, telling Abby to never speak to her again.
Leery Manor. Dawson and Joey are studying at the kitchen table as Gail feverishly prepares a meal. When Mitch walks in, she tells him that some reporter is visiting from New York, and he’s coming for dinner. Mitch freaks at the word “he” on account of the fact that it’s Saturday and their agreed night for sleeping around is Thursday. She says he’s just a coworker, which Mitch doesn’t find comforting, and she says he wouldn’t understand because he doesn’t HAVE coworkers on account of not working. On the back of that sick burn, Dawson and Joey suddenly find an elsewhere to be. On the way out, Dawson tells Joey that his parents are freaking him out, and she says it’s just the full moon.
Diva: Leerys: stop having intimate conversations in front of your child and his girlfriend. Joey: shut the fuck up about the full moon already.
K: After a Not Commercial Break, Jen’s getting ready for her date. Grams rushes in and asks if she wants to come to Bible study. Jen’s all “LOL NOPE,” and Grams leaves. There’s a knock at the door, and Jen’s surprised to find Abby there. Abby’s pissed about Jen slapping her, seeing as how they’re best friends. She says that she might name call and slut shame, but she’d never hit someone. Jen shoves her out the door.
Leery Manor. Gail and her reporter friend sit on the sofa drinking wine and chatting. The doorbell rings, and it’s Tamara with the plans for Mitch to look over. Mitch gets all “Oh, you remember Tamara, right?” and Gail nods and replies “PTA meeting.” Tamara looks awkward as Mitch ushers her into the house.
Icehouse. Joey sketches customers as Jack makes origami cranes. Joey checks their tips for the night, which total $2.08. She complains about the lack of customers and how the one customer they do have just sits there nursing free refills of coffee endlessly. “Why are you so angry?” Jack asks, and Joey makes this face:
“Bitch, please”.
She says it’s the full moon, but apparently he means that she’s always angry. He walks off and she looks thoughtful.
Over at Jen’s, it seems her date with Abercrombie Fisherman is taking place on her grandmother’s front porch. Which makes sense, because in town everyone would be all “Um, ILLEGAL MUCH?” But it also makes no sense, because GRAMS. Jen asks Abercrombie if he likes his job, and he says that he’s only doing it to save up for law school. He flirts with her some more, and she flirts right back. I reach for the brain bleach and vomit bags. (D: +1)
Leery Manor. Dawson comes downstairs to find Mitch going over plans with Tamara in the kitchen and Gail giggling and drinking wine with Reporter Guy in the living room. He’s all “…….the fuck is happening??” When Gail heads to the kitchen to get more wine, it’s clear she and Mitch are trying to one up each other. She scoffs at Mitch’s plans to turn the building into a restaurant, and says his “Thursday night escapades are overflowing into the weekend.” When Dawson asks what Thursday night is, they send him to his room.
Diva: If you don’t want your kids asking awkward questions about your open marriage, STOP DISCUSSING IT IN FRONT OF THEM.
K: Mitch and Gail argue about the money for the restaurant and their crappy marriage and their respective not!dates, both of whom look increasingly awkward as they can hear everything that’s being said. Eventually, they storm back to their corners. Meanwhile, Dawson stomps upstairs and flops down on the bed, then sits up in horror when he realises that Abby’s in his room, spying on Jen’s date.
Andie’s house. Pacey knocks on the door, and Andie’s mum answers. He apologises for being late, saying that he got confused about where they were supposed to meet, and now they’re going to miss the movie and Andie’s going to kill him. Her mum says it’s fine and that Andie talks about him all the time, and how he should meet her older brother, Tim. She calls out to Tim, and when there’s no response she says he must have headphones on. She ushers Pacey to the dining room table and asks him to finish setting it while she heads upstairs to find Tim.
Icehouse. Jack taps at the lobster tank, and the power flickers. Joey looks concerned, then freaks when she realises the pump has gone on the tank and they’ll lose a fortune if the lobsters die. She rushes around grabbing ice as he gets a tub and starts rescuing lobsters.
D: I would have stolen them all and made a lobster feast. Because I love lobster. And apparently I would be a terrible restaurant employee.
K: Andie rushes in and asks if Pacey’s there. She couldn’t remember where they were meeting either. File this plot line under “Things That Could Be Fixed With Text Messaging” and thank the Giant Flying Spaghetti Monster that none of us will ever have to live through it. (D: It should be noted that K and I both made this same remark in two consecutive recaps without reading the other’s first. #mindmeld) (K: We’re so good at this game.) Suddenly, she remembers that they were supposed to meet at her house. Jack tells her to calm down, but Andie rushes off in a panic.
After a Not Commercial Break, Jen and Abercrombie are getting to know each other. She asks him what his most embarrassing sexual encounter was, and DUDE NO. He tells her that one time in New Orleans, he met a total knock out who turned out to be a drag queen. Jen says that hers is the time she got caught in her parents’ bed. Somehow, this leads to kissing, and DUDE NO. STOP.
THIS IS ILLEGAL
Up in the Shrine o’ Spielberg, Abby agrees with me. (D: But only because she wants Abercrombie to be illegal with her instead of Jen. Sigh.) Dawson asks again why she’s there, and she says that she’s worried about Jen being on a pedo-date. Dawson tells her to leave.
Abby tells him that she heard his screaming parents and it’ll be better soon because they’ll get divorced and then he can get a bigger allowance. Then she tells him that he smells good. I bet Dawson smells like self-righteousness. (D: A+) She massages his shoulders and says Joey doesn’t have to know. He’s all “WTF??” and she asks if they can at least kiss in front of the window so Jen can see. When he says no, she asks if he’ll tell Jen that he and Joey are in an open relationship so he made out with Abby. She leaves, and Dawson gets “OMG I JUST REALISED SOMETHING” face. Downstairs, he grabs his parents from their respective “dates” and asks if they’re having an open marriage. They look guilty.
Diva: I love how they’re all, “Dawson, you’re being so rude to our guests!” As if having a super-loud screaming match that references those same guests when they can hear every word you are saying was TOTALLY POLITE.
K: YES. Double standards, yo.
Chez Grams. Abercrombie tries to lay Jen down on the kitchen table, and she’s all “Yeah, no.” Her hand slips on some grapes and she lands on her back with Abercrombie on top of her. He kisses her again, and she shoves him off and yells that she’s 16. “You’re WHAT?” he says in a pissy tone before getting horrified. Grams arrives and is all “Hey, get the fuck off my granddaughter, yo.” Abercrombie leaves.
McPhee Residence. Pacey wanders around the living room, looking at family photos. Andie rushes in and says that they have to go. Like, immediately. Pacey’s confused because he told her mum they’d stay for dinner. She says he has no right to be there, and begs him to leave with her immediately. Pacey’s confused, thinking that he doesn’t want her to meet Tim. Andie gets teary and reveals that Tim’s dead.
Icehouse. Jack grabs the toolbox and starts studying the lobster tank as Joey freaks out some more. Jack thinks he’s fixed the pump, but he cuts the lights instead. Womp womp. Their one and only customer says “Try unplugging the power source and then plugging it back in.” I’m sorry, I can’t not:
Diva: Do not be sorry, because that quote was literally the only thing I could think of at this moment.
K: Jack tries that, and it works. The lights come back on too. Is there any problem that a reboot CAN’T fix?! They thank the guy, and then Joey whispers to Jack that she wishes the helpful dude would leave. Jack hypothesises that he doesn’t have anywhere else to go, on account of he’s been drinking free refills all night. They look up and he’s gone, leaving behind a $100 tip and a poem written on a napkin. Joey reads it aloud as Jack stares at her:
By moonlight many years ago my true love did I know,
and by that moon I begged her wait but that night did she go.
So, young lovers, heed my words, don’t squander love away.
The moon is changing ever still, soon comes the light of day.
They glance at each other when she finishes, the moon bright behind them. Joey turns to go but Jack grabs her arm, spins her around and kisses her. She pulls away and rushes back to cleaning up.
Leery Manor. Dawson demands to know why his parents have an open marriage. Gail says she’d like to know too. Mitch snaps: “Now, exactly where do you get off being angry? You did this, Gail, I didn’t. We wouldn’t be in this position if you hadn’t put us here.” Gail gets up to leave, but Dawson begs her to stay and fix it. She says she has to entertain her colleague so that one of them has a job. Mitch yells some more about how she’s never been supportive of his dreams. Gail storms out, tearfully.
Dawson starts yelling at Mitch to forgive Gail and move beyond his own ego. Mitch looks like he’s thinking about punching his son in the face. Dawson tears up, saying that Mitch has to make the decision to forgive Gail and fix things. Mitch starts to cry, saying that he doesn’t know how to fix it. His father, he says, taught him how to do a ton of stuff, but not what to do when your spouse cheats. He breaks down completely, and Dawson awkwardly pats his father’s shoulder.
K: Seriously.
After a Not Commercial Break, Jen cries on the front steps. Grams comes out, and Jen begs her not to get preachy. She says that she had the situation under control, so Grams doesn’t need to get upset. Grams says she’s not upset, she’s sick to her stomach about Jen backsliding into her slutty New York ways, because it’s disrespectful. While she’s under Grams’ roof, she has to respect herself and act like a lady. Grams storms back inside and Jen breaks down.
K: Icehouse. Dawson turns up, and Jack tells Joey to take off and he’ll finish cleaning up. He stares mopily after her. McPhee Residence. Andie tells Pacey that Tim died nearly a year ago. The whole family was driving back from homecoming, she and Jack were fighting for Tim’s attention, their mum got distracted by their fighting and crashed into a truck. She asks Pacey not to say anything because she doesn’t want to be the town gossip. He promises not to, and asks if her mother’s getting any help. She starts to cry as she says that they tried but it’s hard because their dad basically bailed on them. Jack helps, but tends to live in a don’t-think-about-it-then-it-didn’t-happen fantasy world. So most of the time, it’s just her. She says that her mum’s fine sometimes, and breaks down. Pacey walks over and hugs her.
Leery Manor. Dawson and Joey climb back up the ladder, and he asks if they can sit on the roof rather than going inside. She starts to say that her night was weird too, and he asks if they can just forget everything, and kisses her. They stare up at the full moon together. Downstairs, Tamara and Reporter Guy have left. “It’s time, Mitch,” Gail says tearfully. He agrees, and says he’ll leave.
Jewel’s “Hands” starts playing (D: LOLFOREVER) as we cut to Dawson and Joey on the roof. Dawson starts to cry, and Joey hugs him. At the Icehouse, Jack reads the poem the customer left, and stares at the moon. McPhee Residence. Pacey holds Andie, rocking her back and forth.
Solely because there was a lack of Pacey’s face in this recap.
Chez Leery. Mitch lies on the couch, staring at the ceiling. Gail sits in a rocking chair on the porch. Over at Grams’, Jen cries. Back on the roof, Joey holds Dawson and stares at the moon as clouds pass over it. Fade to black.
Well. That was drama central…
Diva: And there weren’t even any fucking werewolves.
K: RUDE.
Next time on Dawson’s Creek: ANOTHER EFFING DANCE!! Find out what happens at homecoming in S02 E06 – The Dance.
I'm a 30-something librarian and I still live with my parents because I'm super broke. Leader of Team Heartless Cow. I have an inexplicable love for 90s television, eat too much chocolate, and read more than is good for me.
I'm a J.D. by day/blogger by night who directs her snark and judgment primarily towards celebrities and their many red carpet mishaps. Blogging from the style capital of the world (just kidding - I live in DC), I rant and rave over the best and worst in fashion and pop culture.
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