After Chapter 89 – The worst shit.

Previously: Sex at work.

Marines: We did a live-show on our Patreon recently and someone asked when we would finish After. lol. 

Samantha: *Is* there an end? I’ve sort of just accepted that this is where we live now. Always recapping the most rage inducing book.

Mari: For the love of snark.

We start the chapter with Tessa waking up on the couch the next morning and realizing that Hardin never came home and didn’t message her at all. She calls him, but gets his voicemail and hangs up. Tessa wonders where he is while she gets ready for her day. The library, where he said he was going, closes early and all bars close eventually. She figures that the most likely explanation is that Hardin went to a party, but still worries that he was in an accident. The bottom line is that whatever he’s doing, she’s super sure he’s doing something he isn’t supposed to. Things were good between them last night and then he goes and stays out all night. 

Tessa is in no mood to wear a dress so she wears a skirt. (????) (S: I got nothin’.) By the time she gets to work, she’s moved on from worried and pensive to angry. Her morning passes in a daze, aka we only ever get told she goes to work and then immediately that time passes quickly. Her co-worker Kimberly comes over to ask her to lunch. Tessa takes her up on it and they go to a Mexican restaurant. 

The story pretends for one whole hot second that these two women will not be talking about Hardin (they talk about the weather!) and then Kimberly is like, “so…. how are things with Mr. Bad Ass?” Tessa debates how much information she should tell Kimberly, and them remember she has so few friends. Well, no friends really. There was Steph who she never sees anymore. It’s almost like isolating the victim is part of the abuser’s MO or something. 

Samantha: It’s truly remarkable that this book just threw away a character. Like, this would have been the perfect opportunity for Tessa to call Steph. Again, look at all the warning signs!!!!!

Mari: Tessa decides to tell Kimberly that Hardin never came home on their second night of living together. Kimberly the Hero, says, “I would have his balls if I were you. This is unacceptable.” Tessa is a little taken aback by her “harsh words,” but then understands that Kimberly is trying to help her, not judge her. Kimberly tells Tessa that men are creatures of habit and unless Tessa breaks Hardin’s habit starting now, he’ll keep doing this to her. She needs to read him the riot act as soon as he shows back up because Tessa deserves to be respected. Tessa laughs that Kimberly makes it sound easy. Kimberly admits that it isn’t easy, but it has to be done.

I’d be more happy that we finally have a character like Kimberly except hooray it’s more admission that the author knows how fucked up this all us, but she doesn’t care. She thinks it’s romantic.

We recap the rest of lunch because it doesn’t include talk about Hardin, so it doesn’t matter. 

Back at the office, Trevor stops Tessa to make small talk and compliment her. They are both embarrassed about it, and somewhere in the deeps woods from which he is hiding a body, Hardin’s radar is pinging because another man was near or around Tessa. I can’t think of any reason this interaction would be included otherwise. 

After work, Tessa gets back home and Hardin’s car still isn’t in the lot. She calls him and leaves a curse-filled voicemail, which surprisingly (to Tessa only) makes her feel better. She wonders if Hardin will show up before the wedding, which is in two days. Tessa gets some work done and a few hours later, Hardin stumbles into the apartment without saying anything to Tessa, heads to the room and flops down on the bed. Tessa reviews Kimberly’s pep talk in her head and then follows Hardin. 

Samantha: This scene hasn’t even begun yet and I’m so tired.

Mari: Tess asks Hardin where the hell he’s been, and he slurs that it’s nice to see her too. Tessa asks if he’s drunk, which obviously he is. Hardin takes off his pants. She picks them up off the floor and throws them at him, saying that they have a hamper for a reason. He laughs at her. I’m already seeing red, mostly because I know the end of this will be forgiveness. I’m so angry I could vomit and this fight just started. (S: Love you.)

Tessa screams that Hardin has some nerve, staying out all night, never even calling her, stumbling home drunk, and then making fun of her for her anger. Hardin tells her to stop yelling because he’s got a killer headache. Tessa asks if this is some game to him. Why ask her to move in if he isn’t going to take their relationship seriously. Hardin doesn’t want to talk about this right now and she’s “overreacting.” He invites her into bed so he can make her happy. 

Samantha:

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Mari: Tessa repeats that this is serious, and he can’t do this to her. He tells her to “chill the fuck out” because she’s not his mother. Tessa snaps at him to get out. This gets his attention so she repeats for him to get out. She won’t be that girl waiting for her boyfriend to come home. She expected he would come up with an excuse but he’s not even trying to do that. He can either explain himself or get the hell out. 

In case you forgot, I am the one paying the bills here, so if anyone is going to leave, it will be you,” he says with a blank stare.”

What an asshole. Tessa has spent all these chapter trying to get him to agree to an even split between them and he literally starts fuming whenever she pays for anything. AND NOW HE’S HOLDING THAT OVER HER? BUT WITH A BLANK STARE SO WE KNOW HE’S ~DAMAGED~.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. 

My GOD. I HATE this. 

Samantha:

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Mari: Tessa, instead of taking this opportunity to get the HELL OUT, glances down and sees that his knuckles are bloody so the tragic backstory is getting ready to see us out of yet another argument, I’m so angry. Tessa asks if he got in a fight, and he asks if it matters. She says it does, and repeats, yet again, that he was gone all freaking day. Was he out there beating up people through the night? IS HIS JOB ASSAULT? Hardin is like “Jesus, no,” as if it’s so wild to think that the dude who throws chairs in anger by day, assaults people for fun or pay by night. 

She keeps trying to get the damn story out of him, but he’s accusing her of being on his case. Tessa explains how worried she was and how it’s starting to mess with her internship. 

Your internship? You mean the one my father got you?” 

Tessa decides she’s not even going to respond to that and she’s going to be the one to sleep on the couch tonight. She warns him very sternly to get his shit together, but she’s the one on the couch. She cries a few tears and decides to read Wuthering Heights, sticking to her guns about not sleeping in her own damn bed because Hardin is so wrong. 

I just… hate it a lot. But we can always count on a chapter being over before we form ulcers, or whatever. 

Samantha: Ah yes, that low low bar.

Mari: Bye.

Next time on After: Nightmares and forgiveness in Chapter 90.

 

Marines (all posts)

I'm a 30-something south Floridan who loves the beach but cannot swim. Such is my life, full of small contradictions and little trivialities. My main life goals are never to take life too seriously, but to do everything I attempt seriously well. After that, my life goals devolve into things like not wearing pants and eating all of the Zebra Cakes in the world. THE WORLD.





Samantha (all posts)

I'm a 28 year old graduated English major and almost librarian. I can often be found singing too loudly (poorly) in the car or spending some time (hours) on Tumblr. I am a lover of Harry Potter, the Spice Girls, and too many other things.





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